Secrets in Our Back Pocket
by Scarlet4562
Summary: They hate each other and then they kiss. By 4th year she's fighting an internal battle to stay away from him. We're different people, from different places. It would never work, she said. Who has to know? It'll be our dirty little secret, he whispered.
1. Diagon Alley: The Enemy

This is all Lily Pre-Hogwarts. It doesn't really have much importance to the story, just James and Lily meeting. If you want - you can skip this chapter.

First Harry Potter Fanfic, so stick with me. I hope this will be good.

Summary: Lily Evans, top-of-class, red hair, green eyes. James Potter, second-in-class, black hair, Lily Potter's nemesis. From aquaintances to enemies to competetors to possibly something more. Fate's hand reaches out and intertwines the paths of James Potter and Lily Evans, follow them through the ups and downs of Hogwarts and teenaged wizards and witches. With hormones and mixed signals anythings bound to happen.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters, only a few in this story that I created.

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><p>YOU MAY SKIP THIS CHAPTER. PRE HOGWARTS<p>

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><p>HOGWARTS SCHOOL Of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY<p>

Headmaster: **A**LBUS **D**UMBLEDORE

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)_

Dear Ms. Evans,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a lists of all necessary books and begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

_Deputy Headmistress_

I read the letter in confusion, looking up at the strange woman before me. She was wearing an emerald cloak and had her black hair pulled back in a tight bun under her tall black hat. Her sharp features were tense behind her glasses and her lips, pursed, despite the lack of stress on the situation. She held herself very strictly as she watched me.

I gripped the parchment tightly as I reread it, disbelief echted across my face. Was this a prank? I glanced up from the letter at the woman, searching for an explanation possibly hidden within the lines of her face.

"I am Professor McGonagall, I teach transfiguration. I understand your confusion, which is why I am here. No, Ms. Evans, this is not a practical joke." She said tersely, reading my expression. She took a step backwards towards the tan sofa behind her and set her hat upon it. I looked at her apprehensively, wondering what magic trick she was going to try to befuddle our minds with.

I very nearly ripped the parchment in two when she shrunk robes and all, twisting and transforming, until she sat before them just as stiffly as she did human but as a cat. With a dark coat and markings around the eyes that could have resembled glasses, there was no mistaking that she was the cat. A sigh let slip from my lips. This was no practical joke. I stood up from the cushy armchair and walked forward, with clear intentions, and much confidence.

"I believe you." I said quietly. "Tell me more, please." She seemed to smile slightly as she returned to her human form, which may have been more unnerving than the original transformation. She readjusted her robes, smoothing them down.

"I am pleased to hear this." She motioned for me to sit back down, and she seated herself on the sofa next to her hat as she proceeded to explain the world of witchcraft and wizardry.

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><p>That was nearly a year ago, from today. She had shown us more magic and explained the basics of Hogwarts and the wizarding world. Today I was in Diagon Alley, to buy my supplies for the approaching school year. I only had a few months left.<p>

"Where to first?" My mum asked me. We had just exchanged muggle money for Galleons, Sickles, and Knuts. I had become accustomed to saying muggle and it now rolled off my tongue easily, however much still foreign.

"I would like to get my wand." We walked down the uneven cobblestone streets, absorbing everything. Frog spawn, Quidditch, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, Butterbeer and Firewhiskey. My eyes kept getting wider as I passed each store. What seemed to be a book store was so crowded with books that they were stacked outside the store and in sixfoot high stacks in front of windows, with titles about things as ridiculous as Tales of Beetle and the Bard and Beginner's Spellbook, also Quidditch through the Ages.

We passed Eoroy's Owl Emporium on the way, loud screeches were issued every few moments and you could see owls swooping in front of the window often. I was still baffled by why wizards would want to maintain owls as pets, a rather slow method of transportation, no matter how charmingly quaint.

Men and women in cloaks similar to that of Professor McGonagalls' were running up and down the streets, or perhaps standing infront of a shop advertising a sale on chocolate frogs and Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. It was very easy to become sidetracked when walking among such magnificent sights. Who wouldn't stop dumbstruck if you heard a passerby scoff as the price of _unicorn hair_?

With a glance throught the window of _Slug & Jiggers Apothecary_, I caught sight of a jar of bat spleen next to the jug of eel's eyes. Parcels and letters had been sorted into piles and an owl had just landed on the counter with a letter clamped firmly in its beak! I wish I had a camera to take pictures of everything, maybe I could even make them move as pictures on the covers of books did.

I was shocked that this kind of a civilization was able to remain hidden from muggles for so long, it was similar to a secret society. It _was_ a secret society, one I was about to become part of. My heart pounded as I realized that I would get to live in this incredible world for the rest of my life. I would be able to work magic like I saw witches and wizards doing here on the walk. I would be able to make potions to change my appearance, make someone fall in love, sleep forever. The possibilities were endless. I felt extraordinarily special among these others like me, a bit arrogant possibly.

When we finally reached Ollivander's (which was right next to the pub, _The Leaky Cauldron_) my eyes were the size of dinner plates and I was walking like a zombie trying to comprehend all of the information I had just heard or seen. Above the door read a peeling gold sign, Ollivanders: Makers of Fine Wands since 382 B.C.. Could he possibly be that old? I heard a bell jingle as my father and mother opened the door ahead of me, just as stunned. My mother was tall, with red hair, which was who I had gotten it from. My green eyes were all my father's. She took a seat in the ancient chair by the door. My mother had raised me to be strong and independent. She was going to let me take control of this situtaion, she'd given me the maximum amout of money to spend on what I needed. She didn't want me to use her as a crutch. And I was proud of the fact that she knew she could trust me to not be unreasonable about the spending of the money.

The entire place looked slightly rundown. Behinds a dusty counter was a long hall of shelves filled with shoe boxes from floor to ceiling, some were hanging out. There were also upturned boxes on the floor as well as the counter. It looked as though someone had ransaked the room.

"Who do we have here?" A voice called from behind the rows of shelves, faintly I saw the outline of a man walking towards us from deep in the store.

"Lily Evans," I said timidly. My father put a comforting hand on my arm, but didn't add anything. He went to stand by my mother as the man emerged from the long hall. The man looked very withered and older, he had big eyes, and thinning silver hair tangled that pointing in every direction, and I felt compelled to believe that he had in fact been making wands since 382 B.C.. This must be Mr. Ollivander. I almost took a step back when his eyes rested on me. They flicked to my parents again, who were uninvolved in the situation and seemed approving.

"Lets see.." Mr. Ollivander murmured coming forward with a tape measure. My hands were shaking with anxiety. How was he going to know was I going to have to do something? What if it didn't work and this was all a mistake? What if he decided I didn't deserve a wand and asked me to leave? In all my worry, I hadn't noticed that Mr. Ollivander was now searching the shelves, humming, and the tape measure was now measuring my ear all by itself. I jumped backwards and let out a little squeak as the tapemeasure seemed to be looking at me disapprovingly. I let it countinue to measure, watching it apprehensively.

"Ah-ha!" I heard Mr. Ollivander cry from the hall of shelves. As if emerging from the mist, Mr. Ollivander bounds forward, holding a box. He pops the lid open and offers it to me. I stare at it dumbly. It looked to be maybe a foot and it was a light wood wood.

"Well, give it a wave." He demanded. "Twelve-and-a-half inches, cherry." My stomach tightens as I realize that this is going to be my first wand. I will be able to preform magic with this!

I reach to grab it out of the box and my fingers had barely brushed the wand when he muttered, " No, no, no. Put it down." I thought I had done something wrong until he pranced towards his shelves, cheerful as any hundred year old man.

He leaves the box on the counter as he searches for another one. From the shelf right behind him and pulls out another wand, much shorter than the first.

"Hmm, 9 inches, mahogany." He lifts the lid off and unwraps the wand, handing it to me.

"This one is very pretty." I say hopefully, as I take the wand.

"Ay, but the wizard does not choose the wand, the wand chooses the wizard!" He shouts joyously. What an enthusiastic man!

Already, knowing what to do I wave it in a big arch, mistake. All the boxes on the ends of the shelfs fly off, crashing to the floor. "I'm so sorry." I gush, "Let me hel-" I stop, the man is laughing. His head thrown back in utterous joy! He waves off my attempts to help repair his shelf. He snatches the wand out of my hand, but not in a rude way. More with anticipation of finding the right wand.

Scores of wands later, I am beginning to see why his shop is such a mess and how increasingly frustrating it is to find a wand! Maybe we should have saved this one for last. Nonetheless, I am having the time of my life and Mr. Ollivander seems to be too. He is beaming, eyes scrunched together with laughter. Every time one of the wands doesn't work and another part of his store is torn apart, he laughs even more maniacly than the time before! My parents were enthralled by what the wands were doing.

"WAND NUMBER 84!" He shouts. Yes, I really had swished that many wands. Imagine what his store looks like! "I think this will be the one! Gut feeling." He explained.

Slowly as if building suspence he lifts the top of the box. He paused. "This is a very special wand. Unicorn core, and blessed by the unicorn. It will give light to only he to whom the wand belongs.

In the box was a wand. It had a silvery almost imperceptible glow about it. Strands of silver and unicorn horn danced together, picture perfect. I lifted the weightless wand out of the box and felt its glow inside myself. I felt the power course through me as I lifted it. As if the raw power itself was sprinting through my veins igniting every single ounce of power until everything in me burned with the desperate heat of a raging inferno. The feeling was inexplicable and one that would stay lodged inside of me forever. The feeling made me recall moments for the whole of my life when I had unknowingly preformed magic, but on a much smaller scale. Wind whips around my head as I desperately channel the wands power and mine into the least destructive thing I can think of on the turn of a coin. I turn as the wind settles around my head, with a prideful smile on my face that reaches my eyes from an inescapable happiness, to Mr. Ollivander who was beaming just as big as I was.

"Brilliant!" Mr. Ollivander exclaimed. "Never have I seen anything like it. _And I remember every wand I ever sold!_" He was in awe, completely, and so was I.

"Its such a beautiful wand, thank you so much Mr. Ollivander." I gushed, thrilled with the wand. He shrugged it off, simply nodding and smiling.

"I hope it will do you good use, Ms. Evans." He replied, sitting in another creaky old chair behind the counter.

"How much will it be?" I asked him, dreading the answer. At the mention of money he seemed to age a few years. His eyes dimmed a bit and he sank back into his chair.

"For this wand," He looked at the wand, then at me and back to the wand, "I'll have to say thirty Galleons."He sighed uncontently.

I gaped at him. Thirty Galleons? He couldn't be serious! Most wands only cost five to fifteen Galleons; this wand was more than twice the price. That was nearly one hundred and fifty pounds! That was ridiculous. I considered asking if two wands could choose the same wizard, but decided against it. I already felt a connection with this wand and I was compelled to never set it down. I didn't want to leave it here to be found by some careless buffoon. It was such a beautiful piece of equipment, like a slice of a silvery moon.

"I can deal with twenty four Galleons, but I simply can't spend any more than that, as beautiful as this wand is." I said after more careful deliberation. "I could pay you overtime. In installments?" Lily asked desperately.

He thought about it for a few moments. He glanced at the wand then back at me. "Okay. But you better be the best charms student Hogwarts has ever seen, okay?" I had expected him to argue with me, an incredible wand like that but I sensed he liked me, and wanted to cut me some slack. Glad that I had saved money, I was slightly miffed that I didn't get the opportunity to show off my incredible wagering skills. I dug around in the sack of coins finding the Galleons. With a pang, I felt how few Galleons were left, and I still had to buy all my books. I could not be as greedy with anything else.

I handed the Galleons to Mr. Ollivander, and without even counting them, he merely threw them into the pocket of his gray, shabby robes. From under the counter he pulls an emerald cloth with gold and red weaving around the edges with the Ollivander insignia on the corner and delicately wraps it around the wand a few times, before placing it in a yellow and purple box, again with the Ollivander insignia on it. Heart pounding and arms twitching at the purchase I reach across the counter and take the bag from Mr. Ollivander.

"Thank you, sir." I say. He does not reply, but smiles and nods, shrugging it off again. My mother gets up from the creaky chair and exits behind me with my father on her heels. He's a very go with the flow kind of guy, but I knew he was bursting on the inside, too.

"Let me see, Lily." My mother squeals like a girl. I laugh and slid the top off the purple and yellow box in my hands. My mother stares from afar. "Wow, Lily, that's gorgeous. You can really do magic with that? With all his muttering about the wand chooses the wizard. Can they think?" She gushes questions, my dad a few seconds behind her.

"Yes, I don't really think they can think on their own, but I think they are still extraordinarily smart for an inanimate object. Did you see the wind?" I asked my father and my mother, proudly, hoping they had. It would be the final proof that this was not all just some really crazy prank.

"Yes but we weren't quite sure what it was. Was that you?" Of course, random wind would confuse anyone. I take the wand out hoping for the earlier gush of power, but am disappointed with only a faint but strong surge to my elbow. I didn't know any spells yet so nothing happened, soon enough it would though.

"Yes, me and the wand." I quickly realized that we were stopped still in the middle of the road, earning a few annoyed glares from people who had to try to maneuver around us. I tugged on my father's arm, dragging him to the side of the street, my mother following.

Wrapping my wand up in the emerald cloth, I placed it back in the box.

"I think you spent too much on it." Mum said criticisingly. She was a penny pincher. We'd never had a lot of money and lived frugally. My mother was right.

"I agree, it was expensive, but I am going to be using it for the rest of my life. It's practically indestructible, and its exquisite and exotic. I love it." I replied. "So rather than buying several not-so-good ones, and in the end amounting to the same cost as one good one to begin with. I just start out with the latter." My father nodded.

"That makes sense. Where to next?" My father asked me. "Cauldron, potions, books?"

"I think the most efficient thing to do would be to get the cauldron so that I can carry everything else in it. What do you think?" My mother nodded along with my father. I pulled out the list of required supplies to make sure that I knew everything we needed to get.

_Hogwarts School_

_of Witchcraft and Wizardry_

_**UNIFORM:**_ _First year students will require:_ _Three sets of plain works robes (black)_ _One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear_ _One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)_ _One winter cloak (black, silver fastenings)_

_Please note that all pupils clothes should carry name tags_

_**COURSE BOOKS** -All students should have a copy of each of the following:_

_**The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1)** by Miranda Goshawk_ _**A History of Magic** by Bathilda Bagshot_ _**Magical Theory** by Adalbert Waffling_ _**A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration** by Emeric Switch_ _**One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi** by Phyllida Spore_ _**Magical Drafts and Potions** by Arsenius Jigger_ _**Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them** by Newt Scamander_ _**The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection**_

_**OTHER EQUIPMENT** _ _1 wand_ _1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)_ _1 set glass or crystal phials_ _1 telescope_ _1 set brass scales_

_Students may also being an owl OR a cat OR a toad_

_PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS_

"Cauldrons, here we come." I said. At last we started to walk back toward the muggle-wizarding money exchange counter, to Flourish and Blotts that we passed earlier. The cheerful looking store, crammed with people was much harder to maneuver in than I had assumed. But for easier pickings, they had sorted the books that Hogwarts students needed by grade level so I only had to go and pluck the top book off the stack and dodge and weave my way to the counter! The cauldron we had picked up earlier already contained my phials telescope and scales, not to mention the wand I had aquired recently.

Several of the stores we had to go into were rather spooky, the potions shop for one, Slug and Jiggers Apothecary, a rather smelly shop, though a small fault could easily be overlooked for the wonders within. The man at the counter had leered at every single person who came through the door with black eyes. The store was similar to most of the stores we had walked through todady. The walls were tan paneling with stone floors, there were about ten aisles filled from ceiling to floor with some of the standard potion ingredients. There were also barrels scattered randomly on the floor and suspicious looking claws and fangs hanging from the ceiling. On the opposite side of the stores from the aisles was the counter, behind which were more scarce ingredients, or more scar_y _and more -the-less, it may have been my favorite store.

We spent about an hour in there alone, though I could tell that my parents were itching to get out I simply couldn't pull my self away. I looked at every ingredient and read their description, retaining many of them for future use. I had leaned across the counter and scrunched up my face reading the small descriptions for the more dangerous potions behind the counter. I spent another fifteen minutes, idley flipping though the potions books that leant against the back wall. Potions about blood-replenishing, deflating, hair-raising, which some of the more gruesome potions were. No matter how ghastly they were, it was enchanting (no pun intended).

I had already known why they, I guess I should start saying 'we'; I had already known why we kept our world secret, but as I thumbed through these pages of potions, it reinforced my reasoning. Can you imagine the chaos if muggles knew what was possible with our magic? Muggles would be insane with greed, desire for beauty, desperation to save a loved one with the tools we had. We would be studied and stalked (however hard those may be for a muggle). It would turn into a heirarchy. It was merely much easier this way, and may I say a bit more exciting.

Finally I had to tear myself away from the store with the realization that my parents would probably appreciate it if we finished before nightfall. We had a hour drive to get home.

"The only thing left on the list is uniform. I say a shop called Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions not far from here that seemed to be rather popular. I don't mind a wait for good quality, are you okay with that?" I asked them stepping outside into the sun, now with my potion ingredients and scales.

"No pain, no gain." Dad says in an attempt to be smooth. I scoff and laugh at the same time, weird effect.

"Nice, Dad." I grin at him, "You're nearly as smooth as 40-grit sandpaper."

My dad, who has experience in construction, also the reason I know what 40-grit sand paper is, cracks up. Mum just rolls her eyes at our antics. We casually banter our way to Madam Malkin's and are pushed into the store by the overwhelming number of people rushing to get down the street.

As I enter the store infront of my parents, I'm surprised to see that it isn't quite as busy as it appears to be from the outside, there are a few parents waiting in chairs by the main entrance area, where I am now, and only one boy. I take a step further into the store to let my parents by, and glance at myself in the mirror right next to the door.

I take a good look, saying to myself, 'You are a beautiful, smart, and confident witch. You will be able to do this.' Withdrawing from my glance at my inner appearance I take a look at my physical body.

I have lusterous, deep red hair, that curls into thick long curls. My hair is about to my waist and my eyes are green. I'm about four foot six inches, very short but to be honest I didn't mind. I would never be a model, but being short was fun! From a third person perspective, I have to say that I am very pretty. I am a bit too young to be thinking about my appearance but every girl does. I have pretty much flawless skin, though that could change. Acne, I don't have yet, echh. I have small feet and slim, strong legs. I do happen to have a bad habit of biting my nails, which are stubs, but feel I faired very well on the appearance scale.

I walk up to the woman standing in front of a rack of hangers, hung with cloth lengths.

"Excuse me, do you work here?" She was tall with black hair cropped short at her shoulders in a staight bob. She turned around with a smile on her face and I realized that we was probably three year older than me, minimum. But what struck me most were her eyes, so unique and extraordinary. They were a deep shade of violet. Gorgeous. She was very pretty and had a dark tan.

"No. I'm babysitting my brother." She said, dissatisfied, miffed with the arrangement. "But if you just sit down, Madam Malkin will probably be done in a moment and then you can go. She's rather quick. Are you a first year?"

"Umm, yah. You? Oh well, I guess not if you're watching you're brother..." I trailed off.

"I'm a fourth year, that's my brother, James." She rolled her eyes at him, "He can be a bit immature. If you're headed to Hogwarts, which I'm assuming you are, you will learn quick enough." She grinned at me.

"Oh, well. Here she comes, Madam Malkin. I'd better go. It's nice to meet you. I'll be seeing you." I nodded my head at her, before drawing Madam's attention. She grabbes my arm roughly and the boy named James' pulling us into the back room full of mirrors.

James was a tall, a few more than we, skinny boy. He had jet black hair that was sticking up in the back and glasses. He wouldn't sit still, shifting from foot to foot as if waiting for something. Being rather irritated from his ill distributed balance, I broke the silnce.

"Hello, I'm Lily Evans." I said clearly. He glanced at me a moment before responding.

"James Potter." He replied cheerfully.

"Pleasure to meet you." I said politely.

Oh, if only I knew.

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><p>"Are you headed to Hogwarts?" I asked James after a few moments of awkward silence, trying to keep the conversation rolling. I wanted to have at least one friend before I got on the train and this boy seemed nice enough.<p>

"Of course." He said egotistically, maybe not...

"Yah, me too." Though I felt like I was adding it as a side comment because he hadn't really asked.

"Yep, I'm gonna be in Gryffindor, home of the brave." (A/N But that's the US! Ha-ha.) He said enthusiastically.

"I'm assuming you're referring to the houses of Hogwarts?" I asked curiously. He looked at me for a moment, and then nodded. He glanced at the floor scuffing his tennis shoe on the silky hardwood sullenly.

"You're a muggle-born, aren't you?" He asked me, though already seemed to be aware of the answer. I was offended by his apprehension, not to mention his previously displayed cockiness; McGonagall had mentioned some people's dislike of muggle-borns but told me it was nothing to worry about. Imagine, the first person I meet being prejudice against me.

He looked stung, "No! I'm – Don't be offended, but feeling a tad sorry for you. Some people can be really rude about it. So, no, I'm certainly not prejudice, despite me being pureblood." He said defensively. So, he was a pureblood.

"Oh, sorry, I kind of jumped to conclusions. So you're pureblood?" I asked, once again it was awkward. Well, what a controversial topic to stumble across for a first impression. That's me, opinionated.

He shifted from foot to foot. "Um, yah, Potter." At the time, I didn't realize that the name should have meant a lot more to me than it did. It was one of the most respected magical names. "So, which house do you want to be in?" He asked. These Potters don't seem to like sticking to one subject too long. As he began to tell me which house he wanted to be in Madam Malkin reentered the room with cloth and draped it over both of us cutting and sewing the fabric onto both of us at the same time.

"Well, I think either Gryffindor or Ravenclaw would be good. I know I'm not going to be in Slytherin. And Hufflepuff seems a bit bland if you don't mind me saying." I said. I had been well informed.

He nodded once more, "Yes, I have to agree. I see it quite the same way you do. I think I would do quite well in either though." Like that didn't sound arrogant. "Family would be a bit irritated if I ended up in Ravenclaw, would break tradition." He snickered, "But I'd like to end up in Gryffindor." He seemed to have a lot of knowledge of the subject.

"Do you have older siblings who have been?" I asked him. I wish I had older siblings who had gone, so I wouldn't be walking totally unguided. Sometimes it is good to have a slightly beaten down path to look for.

"Yes, quite a few. I have one older sister, I do believe you've met her. I have three older brothers, yes, I am the youngest. There's Pete, Logan, and Jeff. Pete's married and we only visit each other about once a year for a family reunion, just within the immediate family. Jeff's just finished his last year of Hogwarts. I missed him by a year, but he's started off working as a diplomat for goblins and wizards, though, unfortunately that jobs' not going anywhere any time soon, too much strife between our races." Controversial topic #2. "And then Logan is going to be three years out of Hogwarts this year. He's an auror. I'd like to be an auror, too. Again, don't see him too much." He seemed to have an admiration of his older brothers'. I would never admire another sibling, Tuney or Petunia, had become very cold and rude since Professor McGonagall came to our house. I missed the old Tuney, but didn't linger on it. It was too depressing, for there was nothing I could do to make her like me again.

"What's an auror?" I asked him honestly. I recall hearing it or reading it somewhere but I couldn't quite recall.

"An auror is a wizard who fights dark magic, or wizards who use dark magic, you chase them places and defeat them. Then you take them to Azkaban, the wizard prison." He tacked the last line on assuming that I didn't know what Azkaban. Usually I would have been offended by the assumption that I didn't know something, but in this case I truly didn't know.

"I might like to be a journalist, well that was when I was looking into muggle careers. I have many more options now that I know I'm a wizard." I said, "But it's not very definite. I really like potions." He crinkled his nose, it was cute I admit.

"Ew, potions." He said, "I much prefer Transfiguration. Taught by Professor McGonagall." Professor McGonagall?

"Stalemate. So why are you doing you're school shopping so early?" I asked him. The conversation flowed smoothly with no effort what-so-ever.

"Well, I was already meeting a friend, and told my mum I'd get some shopping done along the way. You?" He asked me, as Madam Malkins put the finishing touches on his robes.

"I want to read all my textbooks before I go to school." He looked at me a bit dumbfounded. I sighed, I got a lot of this. I was a nerd, and a bit of an overachiever. We didn't say much else until Madam finished our robes. As soon as he'd paid for his robes, he had raced outside to greet a black haired boy, who had been waiting. I didn't much like the arrogant boy, he was a bit too self-righteous. But I'd rather go to Hogwarts with an aquaintance than an enemy, so I hadn't expressed my dislike of James too early. I hoped I wouldn't have to see much of him at school.

"Okay, what kinds of robes will you be requiring?" Madam Malkins asked me, quill poised over a form. She began filling in all of the employer chart sections.

"Standard Hogwarts uniform please." I said, politely.

She nodded. "Is that all you will be needing?"

"Yes ma'am." I said maturely. My sister, Petunia, had always said that when I talk to adults that I talk differently, more maturely. She said that I used big words, and inunciated.

"These robes will be sent to Hogwarts, and the set that I just sewed will be going with you so you can wear them on the Hogwarts Express. Okay?" She told me, sounding as though she had said it a hundred times before, which mind you she probably had, more than a hundred times. I handed her the knuts and watched my robes fold up of their own accord. They floated over the counter and placed them selves infront of me, while she finished the form and sent it flying off. _That _was still going to take some getting used to.

My parents were still sitting in the chairs by the door when I came back into the main room.

"All done?" My mother asked me. I nodded solemnly, sad that this wonderful day was coming to an end. With all the miraculous, strange, scary, enthralling things that I had seen here today, I was even more excited than I had been to go to Hogwarts. I picked up my heavy cauldron, placing my robes within, as I walked to the door of the store.

"Their going to send all the other sets of robes to Hogwarts for me." I informed them. We were walking back towards the money exchange booth, still dodging quick moving shoppers. I shrugged the cauldron from one arm to the other, feeling the blood rush to my hand. The cauldron was rather heavy.

"Here, Lily want me to take that?" My father offered, extending his hand. I groaned in relief as I handed the cauldron over to my dad.

"Thank you so much, Dad." I gushed, rejoicing at the feeling in my fingers. I grinned now that I could look around at some of the other shops without obstruction.

"Whoa." He grunted under the weight of the cauldron, clearly reassessing his previous estimates of my strength. We walked for a few more minutes down the long twisting main street of Diagon Alley, until the booth was in sight.

"LILY EVANS?" I heard a familiar voice from my left call out.

I twisted my torso in the direction of the voice. No way!

"TAISIE?" I screeched. **(A/N Taise like TAY-ZEY)** It couldn't possibly be her. See, last summer I had gone to a summer camp for two weeks. My parents thought I wasn't getting enough socialization, as they would say. And the camp was okay, but there I met Taisie, and we clicked. By the end of the second day, we were best friends. And had the exact same schedule. Don't know how that happened. Whistle carefreely... cough. We didn't break any laws, to say the least. We went horseback riding together, fell into the same lake, ruining my only pair of jeans. We watched movies together when we were exhausted, and gossiped about crushes and other irrelevant things like that all night. Neither of us had a cellphone, and we hadn't thought to exchange numbers, too caught up in the moment, and we parted grieving the loss of each other.

"What are you doing here?" She called as she jogged across the traffic.

"I didn't know you were a witch!" I cried at her, thrilled to be seeing her. I threw myself at her just at the same moment as she did. We collided painfully in the middle.

Stumbling back, we laughed until we were capable of hugging with a little less enthusiasm. "I can't belive you're here. Have you finished your shopping yet?" She asked me.

"Umm, yeah. I take it you've just started." I grimaced in unhappiness.

She nodded. "What school are you headed to?" She asked her fingers crossed infront of her chest.

"Hogwarts..." I said slowly. She screeched again and we embraced once more.

Taisie sat back just looking at me. "Wow. You have no idea how much I missed you."

"Oh I do." I replied, "But you don't have to anymore because, we're going to the same school!" I said in a sing-song voice.

"Sit next to each other on the train?" We both said in unison, then we smirked at each other.

"You know it." Okay, now it's a bit freaky.

"Here come meet my parents." I said, dragging her by her arm towards Mum and Dad.

"Oh, I'm meeting the parents. Watch out." She said in a deep voice, imitating a boyfriend. I laughed.

We reached my parents, and I pushed her infront of me, watching my parents carefully. "Mum, Dad, this is Taisie." Their eyebrows perked up, until they had dissappeared in both my mother and father's hairlines.

"The Taisie? From camp?" They asked a bit excited. I had talked about her a lot.

"The one and only." She answered for me.

"We've heard a lot about you. I hope you're going to Hogwarts." My mother told her.

"Yes, ma'am. I've told my parents quite a bit about Lily, too. Speaking of which, where are they?" She glanced around before her eyes settled on a young couple who stood by the door of _Flourish and Blott's. _"There they are. I'd like you to meet them."

We maneuvered our way across the traffic to Taisie's parents.

"These are Lily Evan's parents." She said motioning to my mother and father. "We will leave you to it." She walked a few yards away from them with me.

"Why didn't you tell me at camp that you were a witch?" Taisie asked me lightly.

"I didn't know. I'm a muggle-born." I told her this cautiously, I was beginning to realize that I shouldn't be giving out this information on first encounters, some people were prejudice against it, a bit more so than I had expected. Or they may just be plain arrogant, I thought, thinking back to the Potter boy I had met in Madam Malkin's.

"Oh. I'm halfblood, Mum's a muggle, Dad's a wizard." She told me tossing a lock of her long black hair over her shoulder. Taisie was quite a bit taller than me, by at least five inches. She was going to tower over everyone at school! She had straight, black hair, and a pale complexion. It contrasted shockingly with the dark hair, but somehow she made it look not awkward. We were both pretty, just different kinds of pretty.

"Professor McGonagall came to our house to tell us about it." I informed her. She was unfamiliar with the protocol of informing muggle-borns of their capabilities.

"My dad had mentioned her before. She's supposed to be a very good teacher, they are all supposed to be, but very strict too. Ugh." She huffed. I rolled my eyes at her, I had more appreciation of disipline than she did.

"Come on, you know me. I think that's how a teacher's supposed to be." She crinkled her nose in disgust.

"Nerd. Anyways... You should come shopping with me." She proposed. "Yeah. We can set our parents up with a table at a restaurant and we can take the reigns!" She said enthusiastically.

"Sounds good, I'll go ask my parents." I said, turning back toward our parents, who were now engaging in small talk.

I waited until there was a break in the conversation, and opened a door for Taisie to pop in, figuratively speaking.

"Hey, Mum. Can Lily and I go do my shopping while you hang out here with her parents?" She had never really been one to beat around the bush.

Mrs. Marcus, that was Taisie's last name, considered it a moment. "I guess if its okay with her parents." She said. Taisie nodded at me conspiciously.

"Hey, Mum? Can I go shopping with Taisie?" I asked her. I didn't tack on the 'alone' part yet, not the right time.

"Yeah, sure. I'm going to jump the gun here, and assume you weren't planning on including us in that trip?" She laughed clearly as I shifted from foot to foot, ringing my hands. "I think thats okay." She smiled at me, then looked at Mrs. Marcus, "Did they run this by you?"

"Run what by us?" Mr. Marcus asked.

"Um, shopping on our own, Lily and I?" She said cautiously. Her father frowned.

"Can I trust you with the money?" He asked her, unsure.

"Yes," She said, que puppy-dog eyes. She was pulling out all the stops.

Hesitantly, Mr. Marcus extends the bag. "This is you're chance. You're gonna have to be responsible with money when you get to Hogwarts, so this is you chance to show us you can be responsible. Okay?" He told her sternly. Her smile flickered for a half a second, then she was nodding and agreeing. I don't think she had planned on being responsible. In her mind, I was sure she saw this as her last chance to be wild with money before she wouldn't have any access to stores for a whole year.

"Yes," She cried quietly, as we walked quickly away from them towards, Slug and Jiggers Apothecary, the store I was anxious to show her, though I was unsure if she would appreciate it as much as I did.

In the end, she didn't love the store near as much as I did but, she cared about me so she acted unbored for the entire time we were there, nodding at all the right times and not spacing out. I showed her some of my favorite ingredients, several of which ripped gasps from her at their source or use. She liked the ones with pretty end results, things like unicorn hairs and other dainty things. Eventually we, well I was torn away from them once again and we paid for her ingredients, which were packed neatly into a box, and walked back out into the sunshine.

Taisie wasn't a very practical person, so getting a cauldron first made no sense to her, and she rolled her eyes at my feeble attempt to persuade her to purchase that first. She wanted to get her wand. I didn't argue after she told me that for I had wanted to do that first also, and I didn't want to be hypocritical.

We started the long walk to the other end of Diagon Alley, where Mr. Ollivander's was located. Halfway there, I caught sight of the black hair boys again. They were peaking around the corner of a closed, rundown building, seeming to see someone they quickly pressed their backs agains the alley-way wall. I ignored them and kept walking.

"Taisie!" Someone called infront of us. I squinted to see who had called the name. The source of the shout was a pale girl with dark hair with deep red streaks in it, who was running towards Taisie in a frothy skirt and a loose top, with a belt between the two.

"Vivian?" Taisie gasped. "I should have known I would be seeing you soon!" She wrapped her arms around the girl when she got close enough. Well, we were all meeting old friends today.

"Yes, you should have. You have known since We were three that you would see me again now!" The girl called Vivian said, exhuberantly. She noticed me standing there awkwardly, "I'm Vivian, the vivacious one." Vivian smiled widely at me.

"Sorry, Lily. This is Vivian, my cousin, she can be a bit over enthusiastic sometimes. I don't get to see her a lot. Our parents don't get along." Taisie explained laughing.

"Yep. I'm gonna be in the same year as you and Tay." She cried pulling us both in for a hug. "Have you done your shopping yet?" She asked us after we were released from her tight grip.

"I have but we were just getting started on _Tay's." _I told her, "Would you like to come?" I offered politely.

"Yeah, of course. Let me get rid of my brother." She turned on her heel and started off towards a lost looking boy who looked to be about the same age as Vivian, with similar features.

"That's Vivian's twin brother. He looks a bit lost, I don't think he's ever been to Diagon Alley." Taisie told me. "She pretends like he's annoying, but they are best friends. He's actually older than her, born a few seconds earlier, but you must've heard the whole 'girls are more mature than boys' speech, she's really quite into that one."

About half way there the boy saw her, frowned and was going to walk over to her, but he quickly tripped over thin air. It looked a little suspicious. Well, it didn't but as soon as he fell, I heard cackling from nearby. Upon further inspection, I realized it was the two boys, James and his friend, who had their wands out, leaning against the wall laughing. James' friend glanced over his shoulder, looking in the vacinity of Vivian's twin, and burst into another round of laughter. My cheeks flared with anger.

I stalked over too them. What right did they have to torment innocent people? With no provacation, they just jinx him! What is their problem? Those arrogant toerags! They seemed to straighten up when they saw me coming, slipping their wands into their back pockets. James ran his fingers through his hands.

"Did you just jinx him?" I stormed at them. James glanced at his feet momentarily, not meeting my eyes.

"What's it too you?" The other boy said cockily.

"Why? What on earth did he do to you?" I practically yelled. I saw Taisie come up beside me, rocking back on her heel glaring at the pair. She, too, looked rather pissed. With a quick glance over my shoulder I saw that Vivian was helping her brother to his feet, completely unaware that we were no longer in our previous spots.

"We don't need a reason." James' friend said. I saw James grimace.

"Lily, we're just kidding arou-" He tried to soothe me.

"Wait, you know her?" The friend looked at James. I opened my mouth to explain the circumstances, of which James and I were not friends. I didn't want to make enemies before I even got on the train, but it was practically tattooed to the inside of my eyes, to fight for the underdog. Or in this case the unaware, passerby, who got caught up in obnoxious boys' games.

"Yeah, we met a little while ago." He explained.

"Well, tell her to chill then." He said rudely, James gave him a look.

"Serious..." James said. Okay, that didn't make any sense. Whatever, I was done listening to their bickering.

"Why did you-" I started in.

"Tay, Lily? Where'd you go?" I heard Vivian shouting for us.

I didn't say anything else to the boys, just glared at them befor whipping around and stalking back toward where Vivian and her brother were standing, Taisie hot on my heels.

"Where'd you go? Oh, never mind. Tay, Lil, this is my brother Aaron. He's gonna be in our year, too. We're twins." She told us quickly, motioning to her brother at the appropriate times.

"This is my favorite sister." Aaron said, jabbing a finger at Vivian, wrapping his other arm around her shoulder. Aaron was three or four inches taller than Vivian probably, and was about the same height as Taisie. He was a monster compared to me, nearly a foot taller! He too had dark hair, but his had blue streaks in it, though they seemed to be coordinated. The streaks were in the same area of hair on both of them. His skin was pale, but he seemed to have a slight bit more of a tan than Vivian or Taisie. They all had large eyes, either a dark shade of blue or a similar shade of aqua. Despite being related by blood to Vivian and Aaron, and having a similar complexion, there was no possible way then anyone could look more alike than Aaron and Vivian. They had the exact same facial structure, except that Aaron's was a bit more masculine, and he was built like a boy, where as his sister, was femininely sturdy. But that didn't take away from her rambuctious personality.

"Hey, Aaron. I'm gonna go shopping with the girls, can you handle this on your own?" She asked him. But before recieving an answer the took each of us by the wrist and tugged us towads Mr. Ollivanders, who was suprised and worried to see me again, curious as to if there was something wrong with the wand, which I assured him that there wasn't anything wrong with the wand. Vivian and Taisie were much easier, as far as wand shopping goes. I had been in the store for more than an hour and a half, while here they both got out in under half an hour. But it left much more time for other types of shopping.

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><p>Two and a half hours later.<p>

"Holy Merlin. My arms are going to fall off." Vivian moaned. She had been carrying her cauldron around for the past hour while the robe sizing and other miscellaneous stuff had been taken care of. I had offered to carry the cauldron for a while, but she declined the offer, ceasing to complain for a few minutes. We were currently walking back towards Tay and my's parents. While shopping, I had chatted with Viv, and gotten to know her well. With Tay, as I had gotten into the habit of calling her, bridging the two of us, we had become fast friends, resigned to the fact that we were going to be seeing a lot of each other. Maybe resigned is the wrong word, something more upbeat would work perhaps.

The sun was setting and it was dark. The street lamps had come on of their own accord, and we were enjoying strolling the streets, which were now much less packed, at a leisurely pace.

Luckily, we had gone the rest of the outing without spotting either James nor his audacious friend. We had eventually conveyed the story of what had really happened to Vivian with her brother. She looked angry, but had decided that her brother probably didn't want her getting involved in his battles, even if he didn't know they were going on. She asked us not to confront James and his friend again. We had reluctantly agreed.

Upon arriving at the area where we had left our parents and finding them nowhere, we searched hung around, 'looking' for them 'intensely' before stumbling upon the in Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour.

We approached the table where our parents were talking and I was thrilled to see that out parents' were so intensly concentrating on their conversation that they hadn't even noticed us approach.

"Hello." Tay said, making her mother jump a few feet into the air.

"Taisie, you mustn't scare us like- _Vivian?"_ Her mother asked rapidly, leaping to her feet in an instant. "Dear, hello. How have you been?" Tay had explained the situation to me earlier. Her mother had no problems with her niece and nephew, but she just couldn't for the life of her get along with her brother and his wife, so it made it difficult for Vivian and Tay to be friends, but now that they would be at the same school every day for several years, they were hoping to repair their previously strong relationship that had been hard to maintain with arguing parents.

"I'm fine. Yourself?" She asked politely, but ill-at-ease.

"Good, thank you. How are your parents?" Mrs. Marcus asked smiling, though the smile looked very forced.

"Okay..." Vivian responded awkwardly.

Sensing a lull in the conversation, my mother jumped in.

"I don't believe we've met. I'm Mrs. Evans, Lily's mother." My mother volunteered. Mrs. Marcus sat back down in her chair, rubbing her forehead with her fingers. Her husband leaned across the arm of his chair to massage her shoulder closest to him.

Thankful for the turn in the conversation, Vivian jumped at the chance. "I'm Vivian Tyler, Taisie's cousin. I just ran into them, while doing my own shopping."

"I take it you're going to Hogwarts with them." Mum nudged the conversation along, helpfully.

"I'll be in the same year." Vivian told her.

My mother smiled, "Well, at least you'll know some people before you get on the train." She said to me. And some people I'd rather not know, I though thinking about James and 'friend'.

Mr. Marcus chose this as the time to join the conversation, "Girls, did you get all of your supplies?" We nodded vigourously. "Well, let's see these wands of yours then!" He demanded jokingly. We all quickly retrieved our wands. Mine was in my cauldron that I had left with my parents, and I pulled it partialy out of the purple case and emerald cloth, feeling the now familiar shock of holding it, while the rest of the parents admired Tay's wand, Vivian, too was still retrieving her wand. Vivian and I had already seen her wand and expressed slightly reserved compliments, because she had already heard all of them when she first recieved her wand. Next, Vivian and I showed them our wands, and they all 'ooo'ed and 'aaahhh'ed in the appropriate places.

"Oh, there's a waiter. We should probably order what we want before the restaurant closes." My mother chimed. There were nods and murmurs of agreement, and my mum quickly flagged down the waiter.

We ordered ice cream sundaes all around, and the waiter sent our order flying off via paper airplane. We spent the next few minutes telling the parents of our trip and soon our ice cream arrived. I was about to take the first bite of cold ice cream with steaming hot chocolate syrup, when I heard a nearby meow. It sounded young and it sounded like it wanted food. I stuck the spoon in the ice cream, and started clicking my tongue to attract the cat.

What I hadn't realized was that the moment it meowed, my parents exchanged a glance.

"Lily," They called me from my cat tracking.

"Yeah?" I asked still looking around, behind me for the kitten.

"We were gonna give it to you when you first got here but she was sleeping but apparently not anymore." I turned around confused, just as my mum lifted a kitten from a large cardboard box beside her that I was dissappointed I hadn't noticed earlier. The kitten couldn't be more than a few weeks old. It could probably fit in my cupped hands. It had long fur, and was a tabby cat, in my opinion the most beautiful, with the orange and the white mixing together.

"This is kind of your going away present. Got her for a steal." My father told me, "Take care of her."

"Oh Merlin. She is so cute!" I gushed. I reached forward to pick her up. Her fur was softer than I could have imagined and when I grabbed her warm belly and lifted her up, the way her legs dangled was picture perfect. I hugged her to my chest so I could feel her purring contently. "What should I name her?" I asked them. I received several suggestions, none of which I felt really clicked.

"Machiko!" Vivian sprang up. I had to admit Machiko had a little ring to it.

I stroked the soft fur on top of the kittens head. "... Machiko." I murmured to her mulling it over on my tongue, she continuted purring as she had since I placed her in my lap. "Machi. I will call her Machi, short for Machiko." Everyone smiles.

"It's a rather odd name. You won't have to worry about that one being seen twice." Mr. Marcos said, grinning at me.

It was almost ten by the time we finished our ice cream and decided to turn in. My parents were exhausted, and still had to drive home, I didn't envy them. I shifted every thing around in my cauldron, and arranged the robes like a bed and tucked Machi firmly in the folds, so I would be able to carry it, easier. I wasn't worried about the robes they would get washed again before I wore them.

I bid goodbye to all of the Marcus's and Vivian, who immediately set off in search of her brother. Her mom had said it was okay for her to stay out a little bit late, that there was nothing to worry about in Diagon Alley, as long as she and her brother didn't go anywhere near Knockturn Alley. Having the fear of Merlin inspired in them had driven them to extreme safety precautions. Viv had sent a letter every hour telling her mother what she was doing and when she expected to be home. We waved goodbye to her as she turned into a quidditch store, probably having spotted her brother, a large quidditch fan.

I pulled myself out of the chair, and dragged my feet following them to the Leaky Cauldron, which was still teeming with people, and out to the front where we had parked our car. I laid down in the backseat, setting the cauldron on the floor and lifted Machi out of it. I cuddled with her until she curled up in my neck and we both fell asleep for the remainder of the long drive.

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><p><strong>Okay thank you to all readers. I hope you liked it. The cat is a supporting character. I'm going to develop the academic opinions of several of the people once they get to Hogwarts. Aaron is part in the story but is not very important, and probably won't be part of the main plot. I hope you all liked this chapter. Again is it moving too fast, should I spend more time on some things than others. Let me know! Review! Review! Review!<strong>

**-Scarlet4562**


	2. Arrogant, Rich Boy Whom I Despise

I made sure no one was looking before running towards the barrier Professor McGonagall had told us about. I gasped when I went through it, as if it was final proof that this school was real and that I was going to be going.

Around me there were scores of men and women and young preteens dressed in the oddest clothing, very similar to the robes I'd recieved at Diagon Alley.

"Lily Evan?" A voice asked. Whipping around, I found yself face to face with Severus Snape. He was getting taller, though in comparison to me _everyone_ was taller. His dark hair to my dismay was no longer long and flopping in his face, but slicked back to an overe-eager amount of gel. His angular face had lost some of the roundedness since I'd last seen him.

"Sev!" I cried, throwing my arms around him. "Golly, I haven't seen you since.. well since I moved."

"You and I will never be long distance people. How have you been?"

"Okay. You? You're getting tall!"

"Not so much." He said modestly. "You're just shorter than I am."

"I'm not short. I'm fun sized." I argued.

He shook his head. "You've never been one to just believe what people told you."

"You can imagine my shock when all the crazy humdrum you told me so long ago turned out to be true!"

'I've never lied to you, Lily." He murured quietly. I laughed and he smiled at the sound.

"Of course, I wasn't to believe you then. I was a stubborn child."

"I'm sure you still are." He said softly and I was reminded that he was always a soft spoken, quiet shy child. He didn't shout or raise his voice or ever look angry. As I was growing up I was told that I when I got angry every part of my showed it. Some people considered me a very outgoing person, and while I was, I knew that I was extraordinarily private. I just didn't share much.

I'd never cried in front of anyone outside my family and even in my family, only once or twice once I was old enough to understand what crying really was. I'm very prideful.

"Lily!" I looked to my right to see Taisie running at me. As far as girls go, over the past few months she was my best friend.

"Taisie!" I cried, running to her hug. "Come here, I'd like you to meet someone." I gripped her arm pulling her to Severus.

"Severus, meet-"

"I know Severus. You were at the Potter's Christmas Ball last year, right? And Potter-" She stopped abrubtly and I saw Severus flush.

"I'm missing something. What have I missed?"

"Nothing. I was just remembering when Potter and Black were caught trying to blow up the tree. I was standing next to Severus when they were caught." Severus forced a smile.

"That must have been it."

Taisie grinned at him. "Yeah, well, Potter's got a huge ego that could do with a lot of deflating."

"Potter, he's the one who hexed Aaron?" Taisie nodded.

"Uggh, but don't be predisposed to hating him just because of me. Vivian should be here any minute. I should go meet her."

"I should too. It was great to see you again. I hope we have some classes together! I'll see you on the train?" He nodded and turned away.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. First years only. You've got a few more years." Someone said as I jumped up onto the trail. I turned around to face... you guessed it, Potter.

"I am a first year!" I cried indignantly.

"Damn, you're short."

"You're tall." I said sarcastically.

'I'm serious." His friend said. I rolled my eyes.

"No your not." Potter smirked.

"Yeah, he is. S-i-r-i-u-s Black."

"How ironic!" I remarked before turning and striding down the corridor after Taisie, tugging my too-big trunk after me.

The boy walking next to me suddenly tripped falling forward over his trunk which had just popped open. He fell roughly and I glanced around. Ug. Potter and Black were a few yards back laughing quietly to each other. I helped the boy up as well I could and helped him stuff his clothes back into his trunk before he walked quickly away blushing furiously.

I walked right up to Potter and Black. "What the hell is your problem?' I demanded. "Is this something you do for fun? Tormenting people? Why on earth would you do that?" Potter spoke up.

With a condescending tone, he said, "Why _wouldn't_ we do that?" He smirked along with Black. "And there's nothing you can do about it. So get lost."

"I will not. Apparently no one else cares enough to tell you what you're doing is wrong, so expect me to be there everysingle to time to remind you what an arse you're being. Don't expect to get away with it at school either."

"Watch me." He said proudly. "And try.. to stop me. Now, I'm getting bored. Move. Say, Sirius can you attest to that?" Black smiled.

"I think we're going to have all the fun we want. Later.. shortie." I glared at them as they brushed past me. Stupid, tall, rude arseholes.

I huffed and tugged my trunk down to the compartment first empty compartment. A few minutes later Taisie and Vivian joined me.

"So we hear that this short little red head was sassing James Potter." Taisie raised her eyebrows.

"He was being an arse." I said.

"Lily, I'm gonna ask you to do something that completely goes against your nature and I want you to tell me that you will, okay?"

"I can't promise anything, Tay." I said, 'I can try though.."

"I want you to not provoke James Potter, no matter what he does. Just stay out of his way, okay? Please, Lily."

"Well, he was picking on-"

"Lily! He can get you expelled in a heartbeat and he has the influence to make everyone in the school hate you. Just please don't."

"I will... pick... my battles. That's all I can promise." Taisie sighed uncontently and sat back. 'So what is the big deal with James Potter?"

"He's loaded. Loaded and according to all the third years is well on his way to being even hotter than his brothers." I gagged.

"Gag me with a spork." I murmured.

"How about we gag you with a bean?" She extended a jelly bean to me.

Smiling, I popped the bean in my mouth

I began choking, chewing on the bean. "This." Hack. "Is. SO." Cough. "Disgusting." Hack.

"What flavor'd you get?"

I spit the rest of the bena into a napkin. "Drywall?"

Taisie and Vivian giggled and popped one into each of their own mouths, gagging at the horrid flavors they found.

We spent a good portion of the rest of the ride, torturing out tastebuds and planning out a strongly worded letter to Mr. Bertie Bott about his detestable sense of humor.

_So this is all I'm going to write for chapter 3 since I accidentally deleted it and this is all that's really required. Besides, I can't even remember most of chapter 3, soo... I hope you enjoyed it and I'm almost ready to put up chapter... um I'm not sure the number._

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	3. Only Seven More Years of Him Left

Okay. Chapter 4 going up. There will be some of James in this chapter, but the actual story is going to start to unfold in the next few chapters. I decided to add Peter to the story because I hate him, but just couldn't imagine the Marauders without him. I hope you like.

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><p>Chapter 4<p>

"We're going to be arriving at Hogsmeade, soon. You best be getting ready. Pack your things up, bring your trunk down, put your robes on." A cracked voice said, through the now open doorway. I looked up from my spell book to see, yet another boys' face. Where were all the girls in this place? I had yet to see any other then Vi and Tay.

He looked to be about third year, couldn't possibly be a prefect yet. He was built and tall. He had a tan and brown hair. "Are you a prefect?" I asked him, curiously. "Not that I don't appreciate you telling us... just wondering." I stumbled a bit.

"Nah, I'm not gonna be either. Gryffindors already got two picked out for our house, and I'd be damned to beat them out of their spots. Just helping out is all." He said modestly.

"I'm Lily Evans. I'm going to be a prefect." I told him confidently, sticking my hand out to shake his. His eyes smiled as he shook my tiny hand

"Christian Briant. With an attitude like that, you sure will be. You have my vote already. What house do you want to be in?" He inquired politely.

"I'm still weighing the pros and cons, but right now I'd be fine with either Gryffindor or Ravenclaw." I informed him.

"I'll be putting my money on you in Gryffindor, okay?" He said, reassuringly. I grinned.

"This is Tay and Vivian." I told him.

"Hello, girls. Excited for school?" He asked them.

"Yes." Tay said, while Vivian nodded before turning back to her IPod. She had been attached to the thing most of the trip. Tay said she always was. When she'd known her as a baby, she apparently just sat next to the radio. I couldn't understand how she was able to listen to the music and maintain a conversation with other people at the same time, but somehow she mananged.

"Get all the mileage you can out of that thing before we get to school. No electronics work there." Vivian looked scandalized, mouth gaping at him.

"Well, goodbye." He said, before she could lash out and injure him, and he hurried off.

"Most Gryffindors are nice people. I think I would like to be in Gryffindor." I proclaimed ot my friends. Vivian was still in shock at the thought of no music player.

Tay agreed, "Yes, that James Potter sounds like a peach." She smirked at me. "Well, Vivian and I plan on going to Gryffindor, and Christian seems nice, so three out of four sound like good odds. Compared to Slytherin with their zero of two."

I nodded, that Slytherin guy did not seem like such a good person. I'm sure Sev will get sorted into Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, or Gryffindor, with me.

I picked Machi up off my lap for the first time the whole train ride, and settled her into her cat carrier, she hissed when I lifted her. She had slept the entire trip and didn't want to miss a moment of her 21 and a half hours a sleep she needs per day.

I flicked my wand at the compartment door, and the screens came down, securing themselve on the pins at the bottom of the walls and door. I also twisted the lock on the door.

When I was satisfied with our privacy I unloaded my robes from the side pocket of my trunk, exchanging my jeans and t-shirt for a sweater and nice skirt. You're supposed to wear a dark, semi-formal outfit under your robes, according to Professor McGonagall.

The whistling of the horn and the jolt that ran along the train, signaled our arrival at Hogwarts. The noise from outside our compartment seemed to raise about ten decibles, as first years began the gossip of what lay outside. I was among them, patience not being one of my strong suits. It was too dark outside to see hardly anything. It had to be at least eight.

Student began filing out the door, in a directed but disorganized flow. I tugged the trunk out of the overhead compartment, narrowly missing Vivian's head. She shot me a look, that I missed. Tay pushed her trunk into the long aisle of the train, Vivian hot on her heels. I followed behind them, having to carry Machi and a backpack and trunk.

I rushed along to catch up with them, so as not to be separated.

"Firs' years! Firs' years. C'mon, follow me. Watch yer step, now." An enormous man stood to one side of the swarm of teens and preteens. He must have been eight or nine feet tall, with a large bushy head of hair. He was wearing a large leather jacket, and was waving his hands wildly, motioning for the first years to follow him.

Tay, Viv, and I were jostled though the crowd, pushing at times to be sure we were headed in the right direction. After a few minutes we had crossed the large traffic way to the large man. Most of the first years had arrived and he was pushing them farther away from the crowd. When all the first years were assembled, he quided us to a shore. There were a fleet of boats, small ones paddle boats by the looks of it, waiting for us.

"Leave yer luggage by those gates, they'll will be sent to yer rooms. Take yer pets with ya!" He ordered, pointing to a set of gates where a very short man was standing. We all tripped over each other trying to get our luggage there and back first, leaving the small man to disappear behind the monstorous pile of trunks and bags.

"Grab a boat. No more than three to a boat." The man said in a gruff voice, quieter now that the crowd was only a trickle. The three of us made a beeline for a boat, two rows in from the outer edge of the fleet. Boats meant water and we were _not _going to be set at the end near the largest expanse of water would likely be.

No sooner than we were settled into the boat, then they started moving of their own accord. I didn't jump for fear of falling out of the boat and into what I now recognized clearly as a small lake.

At one point in the monotonous trip, "Heads down!" rang through the fleet, alerting us of the low cliff we were passing. I would have probably considered the trip dull, but my nerves were eating away at every other sense. If I had been able to see, the nerves would have begun to eat away at my vision also. I was suddenly worried about how, everything would happen. I hadn't really considered every aspect of this expedition. Where were we staying? Who was teaching us? How would be be sorted in to houses? How many people were there? What if I failed out in the first semester? I was about to have a panic attack, when the large man informed us that we were almost there.

About a half an hour later, we were pulled onto a shore, of what had to be where the school would be located at. When the front end of the boats hit land, I could see clearer. Ahead was a _very _large structure, like a castle, and there were lights lit up all over the place, it was enchanting.

We walked slowly out of the boats and onto the land.

* * *

><p>From his own boat, the man said, "Welcome to Hogwarts."<p>

It was much too dark to see anything on the way to the castle, I would have to take a short jog around the grounds tomorrow to get a better look.

We approached the castle on foot, when we nearly reached the doors, a long line of carriages were disappearing from view back in the direction of where the train had come from. I didn't spare them a second glance or I would have noticed the fact that they were self propelled, like the boats.

Ascending the magnificent staircase to Hogwarts, my heart began to beat a million miles an hour, for the third or fourth time that day. I was going to fall into bed exhausted to night. Way too many adrenaline rushes, to be good for me. As the giant man began to walk away,

I chased after, handing Machi to Tay

"Excuse me, who are you?" I asked him.

He turned around and grinned, "Did I not introduce myself? Oh well, I am Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Games at Hogwarts. Pleasure to meet you..." He intended for me to fill in my name.

"Lily Evans. Pleased to meet you too." He smiled at me.

"Good luck at the Sorting, I'll may be there at some point. Go on now." He told me, endearingly. I waved as I turned and ran to catch up with the other students. I sprinted up the long stairs, loving the burning of my thighs as I burst into exersize after sitting idle for hours. I finally caught us. Vivian and Taisie happened to be at the front of the group so I had to sprint around a few of my peers to reach them.

Tay shoved the cat carrier at me. "I liked you're cat better when she was a kitten." She told me. I stared at her quizzically.

"She _is_ a kitten." I stated the obvious.

"No! She's not. She's evil! You hand me the carrier and she starts attacking my hand though it. And it hurt!" She frowned at me, then glared at the cat.

"Maybe she doesn't like you?" I offered. Tay slowly raised her eyes to mine. She looks very scary when she does that.

"No. Shit. Sherlock!" She practically shouted as we walked forward.

"Hey! Language! No need to foul mouth me!" I chastised.

"I"M IN PAIN!" She did shout, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

"Here, Vi, you hold her see if she likes you." I said to Vivian.

"No way! You didn't see that thing. I'd like to live the rest of my life at least ten feet from it!" Vivian objected. I frowned.

"I'm sorry, Machi. I guess you don't make the best first impressions." I told the cat. I looked at Tay.

"Are you okay? I swear I didn't know she would do that. I though she was a people-cat. Let me see your hand." I grabbed Tay's wrist, as not to put pressure on the wound, bringing her hand to my face, so I could study it in the dark. There were several deep gouges in the skin. Minor, but they probably stung. "We could take you to the-"

Tay cut me off, "Not on the first night. They're not that bad anyways. I'lll live." She brushed off the injury now that she had gotten her complaint about my cat out on the table.

I glanced around, seeing that we had now been lead into a small chamber, walls and floor were stone and a large set of doors were to our right. There were probably about fifty of us, a few more girls than boys but you could hardly tell.

Suddenly, a door on the left that I had missed burst open and out strode Professor McGonagall. The sight of her, a rather stern woman, sent several of the first years quivering.

"Welcome to Hogwarts," She began. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony bacause, while you are here you're house will be something like you're family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room."

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn you house points, while any rule-breaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, teh house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours.

"The sorting ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten youreselves up as much as you can while you are waiting." Her eyes, trailed to each infraction on every student's uniform, with disapproval. Her eyes even found Vivian's untied sneakers. which barely peaked out from underneath her robes.

Then she departed the room, someone dramatically, because she had had all eyes on her. I glanced down at my own appearance to make sure it is up to par, but heard an argument break out from behind me. I turn to see James Potter and Severus Snape confronting each other.

"Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?" Severus said aggresively, face inches from Potter's

"'Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart!' Like my dad... Got a problem with that?" Potter said equally as aggressive. I had to admit Potter had a certain ring to it.

"No. If you'd rather be brawny than brainy..." Severus said snootily.

"Good luck finding a brain under _that_ greasy hair, you imbecile." Potter said harshly, "In fact, take a few steps back, would you? I happen to be a big fan of my hair and I don't know if _that_ is contagious." He ran his fingers through his hair, ruffling it. But he didn't step down.

"If you had any desire what so every to be smart, it would be very difficult. There's too much hot air in your head to fit a brain!" Sev shouted angerly.

"Full of hot air?" He scoffed. "If I'm full of hot air, I don't even want to know what's under that hair. I pity the person who attempts to find out!" Potter replied.

Severus didn't have a reply, but was spared the embarrasment by the large doors on the right opening to reveal a huge hall, and Professor McGonagall reappearing.

"Form a line, and follow me." She ordered sternly. Satisfied with our line, she turned an strode forward through the hall.

There were four long tables stretching the length of the room, while one ran parrallel to the door. The four tables appeared to be seperated by house. Each one had a different color table runner; green, red, purple, yellow. The walls were of the same stone as the chamber we had just entered from. There was a loud clap echoing the hall and everyone looked up to see the night sky, which appeared to be stormy. How could there be- but if it's raining, how? Floating in mid-air were thousands upon thousands of candles, illuminated the hall.

"It's supposed to be enchanted." Viv said. "It tell you how in _Hogwarts, A History." _I resolved to purchase a copy of this book, for that had been the third mention I had heard since boarding the train. I noticed that Vi, Tay, and I had been shuffled back. We were no longer at the front of the line. A glance around showed that a few people had been wedged between Potter and Severus. I motioned to Severus to join us, as he was close to us and seemed to be drifting. He shuffed his way towards us as we moved.

"Hey." He intoned.

"Don't think about him. He's a prat. Just ignore him." I told him soothingly. Sev rolled his eyes, and gave me a 'let's see you try' look.

We walked by the two center tables, the one cloaked in gold and the one cloaked in yellow. There was lots of applause as we made our way to the front of the Great Hall. In all the chaos of Potter and Sev, I had completely forgotten my worries about how we were sorted. Now they were renewed with a fiery passion. At the head of the chamber, before the table where the professors sat was a wooden stool and a dark, patched, and wrinkled hat. We came to a halt before the table, behind the hat and in front of the teachers, facing the other students in the hall, who sat anxiously awaiting the Sorting. I trembled in anticipation, did the dirty hat have something to do with how our houses were decided?

The applause died down, and for a moment the air was still, before the hat twitched and burst into song.

_"Oh, you may not think I'm pretty, _

_But don't judge on what you see, _

_I'll eat myself if you can find_

_A smarter hat than me._

_You can keep your bowlers black,_

_Your top hats sleek and tall,_

_For I am the Hogwarts Sorting Hat_

_And I can cap them all._

_There's nothing hidden in your head _

_The Sorting Hat can't see, _

_So try me on and I will tell you_

_Where you ought to be._

_You might belong in Gryffindor,_

_Where dwell the brave at heart,_

_Their daring, nerve, and chivalry_

_Set Gryffindors apart;_

_You may belong in Hufflepuff,_

_Where they are just and loyal,_

_Those patient Hufflepuffs are true_

_And unafraid to toil;_

_Or yet in wise olf Ravenclaw,_

_If you've got a ready mind,_

_Where those of wit and learning,_

_Will always find their kind;_

_Or perhaps in Slytherin_

_You'll make your real friends,_

_Those cunning folk use any means_

_To achieve their ends._

_So put me on! Don't be afraid!_

_And don't get in a flap!_

_You're in safe hands (though I have none)_

_For I'm a Thinking Cap!"_

The applause roared through the hall, deafening. Some of the first years clapped, others looked about, nervous that the hat had just _sung. _It bowed to each of the tables, as though routinely, and there was silence once again.

"It appear we just have to put the hat on." I said to Tay and Vi, relief flooding my body. I was glad that I didn't have any fear of being in front of people. Oh the horror if I did. I wonder if we could tell it what we wanted. I bet it would take it into consideration!

Professor McGonagall stepped forward holding a long roll of parchment. She unraveled a few inches of it and looked up.

"Now when I call your name, you will put the hat on and sit on the stool to be sorted." She glanced back at the scroll. "Abyll, Cynthia." She called, loudly and clearly. A timid looking girl with wavy brown hair stepped forward. Professor McGonagall placed the hat on her head for her and motioned for her to sit upon the stool.

A few seconds later the hat calls loudly to the entire hall, "Hufflepuff!" The table I now understand to be Hufflepuff, table runner colored yellow against the dark mahogany wood, burst into applause. They welcome her with pats on the back and congratulations from all.

"Bones, Amelia." Professor McGonagall calls the second name on the list. When she was sorted into Ravenclaw, we all applauded politely, except for Potter and Black. The only other first years clapping were Potter, who apparently the jokester, had clapped for everyone, loudly and audaciously. And Sirius, whose last name I didn't know, stood next to Potter at the front of the group. He clapped just as audaciously as Potter for most, but on a few random people, for the amusement of himself, he would stop. He would stand stiff as a board, looking overcome with melancholy. He did get a few grins from those in the seats near him. This continues for two or three minutes before I hear Professor McGonagall shout out a familiar name.

"Black, Sirius." So his last name was 'Black'... Oddly, enough the Slytherin table seemed to perk up expectantly. He didn't seem the Slytherin type. He seemed cheery like Potter, so I assumed that he planned on going to Gryffindor, with him.

The hat sat placidly on his head for several long minutes. The Slytherins began to shift uneasily.

"He's a Black! We already know where he goes!" A fourth or fifth year Slytherin shouted. There were nods and grunts of agreement from around him.

"Be quiet, Dalf!" Professor McGonagall shouted sternly at the boy.

Unexpectedly, the hat shouted to the hall, "Gryffindor!" I faintly heard a groan from the boy under the hat, and Black pulls it off and plops it sullenly on the stool. Walking the walk of shame to the Gryffindor table! There were murmurs and objections from the Slytherin table, and the Gryffindor table received him in silence. I felt bad for the boy momentarily. The drama passed for the moment as another student was selected.

"Doyle, Patrick." Was the next name called, and he was sorted into Ravenclaw.

My teeth nearly clattered together as my name was called. "Evans, Lily." Professor McGonagall said. I grab both Vivian and Taisie's hands and give them a squeeze before proceeding.

I step forward, walking slowly towards the stool, very aware of the three hundred plus students' eyes on me. The butterflies in my stomach turn into bulldozers, as the hat is placed upon my head.

"Gryffindor or Ravenclaw, eh?" The hat is speaking to me, and I hope the entire hall can't hear me. "Beautiful mind. Extraordinary courage. Either would suit you. I think, you have a purpose more so than others, Gryffindor with help you achieve that goal. Ravenclaw will hinder you."

"Thank you." I breath as he announces his conclusion to the school.

I stumble to the deserted end of the table, alone. I was the second person, first girl to be sorted into Gryffindor, and the applause was eardrum-shatteringly loud. These Gryffindors were very rambunctious. I got pats on the back and shouts of congratulations from the nearby students as I sat down.

Christian caught my eye, and before returning to the ceremony said "Welcome to Gryffindor."

A few names later..."Marcus, Taisie." was called. A few looks are passed around at the unusual name. An unusual name for an unusual girl. Taisie strolled up to the front confidently, though I knew she was freaking out on the inside. Cool and collected was the impression she put out, mature but ecentric at the same time. A unique combination.

As the hat settles on her head, her eyes disappear beneath it. What can I say? She may be tall, but that hat was pretty big. She sat there for a long moment before the hat decided.

"Better be Gryffindor!" This brought on a monstorous cheer. She was the third first year to be sorted into Gryffindor, other than me and Black and so far most had been Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. I clapped along with Vivian.

Tay seated herself next to me at end of the table set aside for new first years, and waved at Vivian, who smiled back at her anxiously. I wrapped my lightly tanned arms around Taisie briefly, before listening for Vivian's name.

I knowing the Vivian was the immediate next, because her last name was "Mason". I crossed my fingers hoping that Vivian would be able to join us at the Gryffindor table, I would feel awful if she was doomed to a dorm all by her lonesome. Vivian walked gracefully to the stool.

No sooner than the lip of the hat brushed the top of Vivian's hair did it shout, "Gryffindor." I grinned widely, and welcomed her at the table. Black had been sitting across from us his head in his hands for the whole time I had been sitting here. I didn't like the guy, but I wasn't cruel.

"It's not that bad. I'm sure Gryffindor will be just as good as any of the other houses!" I told him, trying to sound enthusiastic. He just shook his head without even looking up. It was obviously not the time to discuss it and I didn't fully understand why everyone wanted him in Slytherin.

The next familiar face called to the stool was the sandy-haired boy who had been reading in the compartment with Black and Potter. Remus Lupin was his name. He looked very skinny and tired, his young face was aged with concerns that should not yet be on his small shoulders. For the maturity shown in his face, I was not surprised that he was sorted into Gryffindor also.

"Hello." I said to him as he sat down.

"Hi." He replied, cheerily before turning to Sirius. I think hard to myself, he's nice, don't judge people by their friends. "It's not that bad, Sirius." He tried soothing him. I tuned out the Sorting to try to understand why the Black boy was so upset.

"You don't know my parents." Black said harshly. Remus patted his back.

"Well, you got me and James. We'll be there for you, okay?" Remus said realizing there was nothing he could do immediately to cheer his friend up. With a last pat on the back, Remus returned to the ceremony as the name, Petegrew, Peter was called.

He was sorted into Gryffindor. I groaned at the next name called. Remus and Black looked up at me questioningly, before turning to their friend, James Potter as he swaggered to the front, as egoistical as everyother encounter. He placed the hat on his head, and I knew I was doomed.

"GRYFFINDOR!" It cried moments after resting on his head. I frowned. The only part of Potter you could see was his mouth, which burst into a wide grin when the verdict was released. He nearly sprinted to the table, plopping himself down on the other side of Sirius, giving a friendly nod to Remus and Peter.

"Come on, mate." Potter said to Black, "I know something that will cheer you up!" He leaned and whispered something in Sirius's ear. Sirius lifted his head, eyes twinkling.

"Okay. You've gotten my attention. Fill me in." I would have continued to eavesdrop but at that moment, Professor McGonagall called Severus's name.

Severus walked quickly up to the stool, and I tucked my foot under me, raising my head the few inches necessary to see over Potter and Black's plotting.

I felt sick to my stomach as he was Sorted. The second the hat touched his head, it shouted, "Slytherin." What made me uneasy was how excited he looked to be headed to all those terrible looking people. I frowned, sitting back down properly in my seat.

"You're friends with that guy?" Potter asked aghast.

"Yes, I am." I said adamantly. Potter looked ticked. "Do you have a problem with that?" But before he could even respond, I finished with, "Well, it's not you buisness, is it?"

"Sorry. I just, it's just that I heard him on the train. And he was talking with two fourth year Slytherins about the Dark Arts. Just thought you should know, maybe you don't know who you're getting in with." Why was I still letting him tear him down like this.

"Well, then it's a good thing he's my friend and not yours!" I told him, angerly. Merlin, I hope I don't have to see Potter a lot this year. Every time I speak to him, I speak angerly. Then I thought back to what Professor McGonagall had said about your house becoming like you're family and nearly groaned aloud.

"Lily, quit glaring at Potter. The headmaster's speech is about to start!" Taisie said to me. In my absense of mind, the last of the Sorting had finished and there were two additional girls at our table. My eyes widened, how long had I been glaring at him? Never mind that prat, I turned to the front of the room where a tall man stood. I must have missed Professor McGonagall putting the Sorting Hat and stool away for it was nowhere to be seen. He had a long white beard and half moon spectecles.

"Welcome, Students! I am Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore! Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Welcome, first years. Welcome _back_ to all others! I have a few words to say before we proceed with our banquet! Here they are: Topsy! Flabbergastion! Abnormality! Uniquity! Combustion! Now. Feast!" He cried.

I stared at the old man as he returned to his seat. What an odd way to start the term! What a charmingly queer old man! I couldn't help but smile along with all the other students.

Next to me, Vivian gave a loud squeak and jumped in her seat. I turned to her, but my eyes were caught by the cause of her jump. Laid out in front of us, was the widest array of meal choices I had every seen. It was a feast fit for a king, for all the kings! There were pork chops, steaks of every variety, chicken pea soup, lasagna and burgers. Roast beef, roast chicken, lamb chops, sausage, potatoes, bacon. Carrots, gravy, and so much more. Across the table all four of the boys were heaping their plates with some of everything, until they simply couldn't fit any more on their plates if they tried.

* * *

><p>"Pure-blood." Potter said quietly, with a glance at me clearly remembering when I had attacked him in Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. Quickly, as if it would change the topic of conversation Potter began shoving food into his mouth a million miles an hour. I felt bad about that I wasn't usually that aggressive. But I wasn't sure if I should apologize after all their cruelty to random people.<p>

"Half." Vivian and Taisie said in unison.

Remus looked at me, "Should I excpect them to do that a lot?" He asked.

I laughed, "I hope not." I joked, sending a pointed look at the cousins. They smiled innocently at me, provocing an eye roll from everyone who was watching. "I'm a muggle-born." I told them. They were my fellow house mates, it's not as if I could hide it.

"Really? How did they tell you? Did you think it was a big joke?" Black looked very eager to know the answers. I explained to him how Professor McGonagall, had come and explained everything to my parents and me. He listened attentively, while I talked. He carried on the conversation by stuffing food into his mouth whenever I tried to get a comment from him on what I walk talking about.

I didn't argue with either of the somewhat irritating boys the whole meal. Vivian and Taisie seemed to like them and I wasn't going to ruin a friendship. I in fact enjoyed discussing with Remus quite a bit, he was very intelligent. Before I knew it the desserts portion of the fiest had also been cleared. Again by magic, and Professor Dumbledore was again standing.

"Now, before we rush to our dormitories, I have a few start-of-term reminders for all of you. Firstly, First years should take notice that the Forbidden Forest located on our grounds are indeed _forbidden!_" I believe I saw Black and Potter exchange a glance. "I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, our caretaker, to remind all students that you are not permited to use magic in the halls between classes. There is a recently added tree, named the Whomping Willow on the north side of the grounds, it is recommended that you stay away from this tree. Lastly, Quidditch trials are being held in the second week of school, speak with the captain of your team for details if you wish to try out for your house team. Now before we go to rest, our school song!"

The entire hall joined into a chorus of the song.

_"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, hoggy warty Hogwarts,_

_Teach us something please,_

_Whether we be old and bald,_

_Or young with scabby knees,_

_Our heads could do with filling,_

_With some interesting stuff,_

_For now they're bare and full of air,_

_Dead flies and bits of fluff,_

_So teach us things worth knowing,_

_Bring back what we've forgot,_

_Just do your best, we'll do the rest,_

_And learn until our brains all rot."_

I smiled when we finished and let myself be directed upstairs to the Gryffindor Tower. Too tired to do anything but sleep I stumble blindly into my bed, hoping to be filled in in the morning.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay. Thank you for reading. Review! It's midnight I'm tired. Goodnight to all. When I get ten reviews I'm posting the next chapter!<strong>

**-Scarlet4562**


	4. 123: Ice is Breaking: I'm in the Water

Chapter 5

I rolled over in bed, nearly falling out of it. The sun streamed through the window in the outcove. Someone roughly shook my shoulder in an attempt to wake me up.

"Come on! Lily, class starts in an hour!" Vivian shouted in my ear. On reflex, from the surprise of the loud noise in the morning I flung my hand out and scarcely backhanded her. "Hey, no need to hit me!" She cried.

Rubbing my eyes, I sat up in bed. I am so not a morning person, and the first day of school affect had worn off a week ago. The teachers were now buckling down, giving us two hours of homework per night per class. I threw the covers off and wrapped a robe around me before walking into the bathroom to take a shower. There were only five of us girls in the Gryffindor first year dorm. The other two girls were, Nicki and Samantha. I wasn't their biggest fan, but we got along okay.

We were the first door on the spiral staircase through the girls' portion of the tower. It was a circular room, there was an outcove with a window beside every bed. It was decorted with an assortment of red and gold pillows. There were originally six beds. However, on the third day of school Vivian decided they were a waste of space and convinced a seventh year to turn it into a couch, and we all had a bit more room. The beds were four-posters with see-through gold curtains on each. They were the most comfortable bed I had ever slept on, it was like falling into a sea of downy feathers. Tay, Vivian, and I had taken one side of the room, Nicki and Samantha the other, the side with the couch. I had the bed closest to the bathroom; Taisie, the one next to me, between Viv and I; and Vivian got the bed closest to the door, with the more private window and dressing area.

Also in this time, did I discover that Machi did not like _anyone_. At all. Except for me, she allowed no one to touch her and often attacked random people with her kitten claws and teeth. Ouch.

I walk out of the bathroom six minutes later, dressed and ready to go. I follow the Vi and Tay down to breakfast to eat. Since the start-of-term feast, the meals had been toned down. They were still delicious, but not quite as extravagant. I sat down in the middle of the table, and filled a plate with eggs, bacon, and toast. W ate in peace, so far a rarity, before heading to our first class of the day, Transfiguration, with the Slytherins. Joy!

We arrived in a punctual manner, to class. I wouldn't have it said that Lily Evans was late to class in the first two weeks of term. Having attended a class in every subject, I had formed opinions on which would be my favorite. I was very good at Charms, but my heart loved potions. Severus and I spent a good deal of time discussing them, though we were not yet adept enough to make tweaks. Our professor, Professor Slughorn was an expert on the subject and I felt I had left a good first impression, because I quickly received an invitation to his first 'Slug Club Term Kick-off Party' which I decided to go to. Severus was also invited as well as Potter, Black, Remus and Peter, invitations Taisie very quietly told me they'd likely received due to their parents status. Black and Potter barely mentioned it other than to make it clear that they felt they deserved to go unconditionally.

My wand, my gorgeous wand. I decided to disguise it. I had asked a tenant in Diagon Alley to color it. I felt like it was part of my soul and the attention it would no doubt receive, like it had on the original trip to Diagon Ally, was _very_ unwelcome. I felt like it was a breach in my soul. I was worried that it would not give light in the dark with the coloring, but my worries were put to rest when its silvery light shone through the disguise when it was dark and I was holding it.

James Potter was quickly joined by a mousey boy named Peter, who like to follow him around. He, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin had become nearly inseperable within the first week, much as Tay, Vi and I. They were quickly becoming insufferable, though. The third day of school, gave way to the first prank in a long line of hysteria. They had enlisted the help of a sixth or seventh year, who exceled at Charms for help. The next day, I being one of the first in the Great Hall, was a victim of the prank. They had bewitched all the food to catapult its self at the unsuspecting student. When you went to reach for the eggs, you ended us being attacked by heaps of eggs spontaniously. Of course the incredible kitchens of Hogwarts liked to immediately replenish the bowl, causing eggs to continue to launch themselves at your face until you remove the serving utensil from the bowl! How clever! Potter completely lacked stealth, bursting into laughter the second it attacked me.

I had screamed at Potter for half an hour, rousing the other student's and thier lack of suspicion. Potter and his big head had a sarcastic remark for everything I shouted, all which he replied in an uncaring tone, while ruffling his unruly hair even more.

Finally, with his lack of response, I growled and stormed out of the hall, to wash the egg out of my dark, red locks, shouting over my shoulder, "And quite running your hands through your hair, you prat!" That would _not _be the last prank Hogwarts saw from those boys.

Ravenclaw had won the House Cup, no surprise. All the points our , quidditch team earned us were flushed down the toilet by the Marauders detrimental pranks. No one seemed to be that irritated with them, except of course McGonagall. Most everyone thought their pranks were hilarious, and were well worth the points. As you can imagine i did not.

Flying lessons with the class proved that I was destined to stay with two feet firmly planted on the ground, as lithe as I was on the ground, the sky was not for me. I couldn't say the same for Potter, his head inflated to twice its original size when Madame Hooch congratulated him on his superior flying skills, and allowed him to soar around while others learned how to land and take off. To my dismay, she often used him as an example for what to do. Potter like to walk over to me and show me what I was doing wrong, smirking the whole time. I would turn as red as my hair from the fact that he was better at something than I was. He like to comment on both the fact he had me beat at something and that my face was the same shade as my hair. He sounded like any eleven year old boy.

Potter and his friends also quickly adopted their annoying nicknames for themselves over the first weekend, The Maurauders. It was catchy, however much I disliked them. My first impression of Potter as a dumb, concieted prat however was mistaken. He was in all of my classes and he was in no way shape or form dumb. He was very smart, he just didn't put it towards what I considered to be good efforts.

Soon, Potter and I fell into a pattern. He would pull a prank, hex a random person, or do something that I disagreed with and I would shout at him. Large crowds often gathered at the scenes of our arguments, and our rivalry became well known. I hardly ever yelled at Black or any of the other Marauders, just Potter. Maybe it was just that he irked me more than the others or the fact that he was usually the one who confronted me about my complaints. I used to be a rather calm person, but around Potter everything bubbled up, and I quickly became furious. I couldn't be in the same room with him for more than twenty minutes without arguing. Potter on the other hand, never really got angry, he only remain cool and collected, smirking as if my anger amused him. Only once had I seen him get very angry. There had been a cruel trick, involving the Sytherins and a small Hufflepuff girl ended up in the Hospital Wing for a few days. I had falsely accused Potter, and he got very angry. He shouted at me, that he could never do that. He wasn't that type of person. I knew immediately that I had been wrong and though he did play some mean tricks, he would never do something so cruel as they had and end someone weak and defenseless as the girl was in the Hospital Wing. He never got mad and he looked so angry and sad that I had thought it was him, that I apologized. I had never apologized to him before. It took a lot for me to swallow my pride and say I was mistaken. There was the calm before the storm for a few weeks, before we got into a huge mass blowout. The biggest fight we had ever had and I nearly punched him in the face.

It only added fuel to the fire, when the Marauders decided that Severus would be a good victim for their assaults, for they had a terribly bad habit of jinxing everyone. I would walk into the courtyard and find Potter and Black in the midst of some ridicule of Severus. I often counter-cursed him out of a lot of sticky situations, and then we both yelled at the Marauders. They had no decency. Merely for their own amusment did they hex everyone they saw, out of boredom, excitement, or on the rare occasion that their jinx had some good provacation, revenge. Potter liked to pick on the weak ones, and I had an instinctual reflex to fight for the underdog, coming to their rescue.

Our common hatred of the Marauders brought me and Sev even closer. I quickly considered him among my best friends, on the same level as Tay and Vivian. Unfortunately, Severus's 'buddies' in Slytherin were also having a very negative impact on him. They had teased his curious mind with tastes of powerful Dark Magic, much to my dismay. They tricked him into overlooking his own morals, logic, and reason and I found Severus was enchanted with the Dark Arts. He talked of them so much one day I had finally told him, enough was enough and that he would never speak to me of them again. He often slipped and I continued to hear more of them against my will. Despite all of my encouragement nothing could sway him from this new addiction, and I decided I would rather be friends with him with the dark obssession than, not and leave him hanging on his own.

The rest of my first year at Hogwarts was successful. I quickly became top in my class, and spent hours studying in the library. I also pushed my determination onto Tay and Vivian, who both became good students. I passed final exams without a hitch, and even spent a few hours afterwards with Remus Lupin going over the tests.

When I got off the train carrying Machi in my arms, I greeted my parents, telling them of all the wonders of Hogwarts that I hadn't included in letters. They wore similar stunned expressions. I had known how they would receive it, but I was curious about Tuney. She hadn't talked to me since she found out I was a witch and I had worried that sending an _owl_ would only make things worse. The fact that she was not there to greet me, did not raise my hopes. As we were leaving the train station I saw Potter walking outside alone. I assumed he was going to meet his parents outside, but then remembered that he was prestigious internationally known heir to his father's fortune. By that time I could see him again he'd stopped at a limosine where no one save the driver greeted him and he climbed into a seemingly empty vehicle. I felt sorry for him that no one was there to greet him.

I was right. She did not greet me when I got home and seemed to be set on a path to never speak to me again. I was overcome with melancholy. I did not want to lose my sister.

Summer flashed before my eyes and before I knew it I was back at school, with new books and the same ecentric friends.

Second year changed my relationship with Potter though. Half way through the year, when most of the students had turned thirteen, including Potter. I was left behind at twelve. Another thing that came into factor was puberty. Girl were suddenly interested in guys and vice versa. Potter was no different. Being one of the oldest in our year, he had plenty on the rest of the students. He had shot up like a weed. He was now probably a foot or so taller than me. His hair was longer, but he still ruffled his hand through it often to make it look like he had just gotten off a broomstick. A habit that I habitualy asked him to stop. And apparently he was still hot on the track to turn out like the now fourth years said as to be one of the hottest boys Hogwarts had ever seen, they shared this opinion of Sirius Black, who also acted like he knew this fact bery well.

The change in our relationship was the fact that Potter was older now. Maybe a trigger was that over the summer I'd changed physically. No, I had not gotten any taller, but I lost all of the remaining baby fat. I had high cheekbones and slim legs. I had softly rounded breasts and smooth skin. I did get acne, but with a miraculous cream I bought in Diagon Alley, I never had to worry about that gain. So Potter had decided at the beginning of the year, and told me so, that I was gorgeous. And took to routinely asking me out on dates. Often while we were arguing he would say, "I'll stop if you go out with me." or "Give me a kiss and I'll stop." I would growl and turn him down where in he would reply, "Oh, c'mon, Evans. You don't know till you try!" I would just walk away, effectively ending most of our disagreements. Apparently his logic was, ask her enough times and she will get annoyed and give in. I guess it's a good thing I'm stubborn.

Second year also marked, Black and Potter's admission to the Gryffindor quidditch team as the best pair of Chasers Hogwarts had ever seen. I was dragged along to the games now that we knew people on the teams, and found that it _was _a rather enthralling game to watch, and that Potter was a very good Chaser.

Severus became even more imersed in the Dark Arts and I began to worry. If this interest continued to increase, I don't know what I would do. I now considered Severus my best friend, but I was worried. I knew that the Slytherins frowned on his friendship with me and I wondered if it maybe wasn't beginning to get to him. Luckily, Tay and Vivian remained loyal and un-Dark Arts obsessed.

Second year passed like first, uneventfully. That is if you don't consider Potter's new approach eventful. The rest of the school did!

By third year, mindless of his despicable attitude and arrogance, he quickly bewitched almost every single girl in Hogwarts and most of the ones with boyfriends. All had fallen head over heels in love with him and then continued to despite the fact that it became _ver_y well know that Potter 'got around', and by that I mean he was a shameless man whore who slept with anyone he could get into bed. Which of course provoked girl gossip and silly-ass stories of his legendary skill in bed. Conversations which I tried to avoid but ran into more so than I would like. Remember that he's only fourteen and a half by this time. But he looked older than he was. He could have passed for fifteen or sixteen easily. Unfortunately for him an advantage when he argued for I did not grow much taller. And he did this around his school work, I shudder to think what he was like in the summer which such a big libido.

Petunia continued to act coldy towards me, to my misfortune. Friends at home had raised no suspicion at my schooling, but I did grow apart from them. Summers began to become miserable times for me. Yes, I owled my friends, but my muggle friends had replaced me and were interested in shopping. When I did hang out with them, I was distant, thinking about Hogwarts and how much I wanted to tell them about the magical community. They no longer called me to hang out. I only remained close with two, who I'd accidentally told before I'd even left for Hogwarts. Them, I remained close with, but it grew difficult when they moved to America, but nows not the time to explain that misfortune.

The end of third year was when the fragile ice my life had been balanced on broke.


	5. 1 Huge Problematic Stupid Reckless Kiss

**Okay I understand that there are things that happen at different years. But for the sake of the story, so I can fit everything I want to happen in I'm setting one event (you will see) two years earlier, so as to jump start some stuff.**

**If that sounded very vague, I understand but you will to at the end of the chapter. Also Taisie and Vivian will not really be in this chapter, sorry! Enjoy, amigos!**

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><p>Chapter 6<p>

I leaned forward in my seat, resting my head on the book and groaned. The last of my exams were days away and this weekend was my last chance for _those _exams and I didn't have half of my study notes covered for those subjects. I was sitting in a back corner of a thankfully deserted library trying desperately to finish up the Transfiguration portion of my studying.

"Come on! You're going to get O's in every subject!" Taisie said enthusiastically, slinging her red scarf over her shoulder with a perfectly manicured hand. We had done everyone in our dormitory's nails two nights ago in celebration of the start of final exams (The beginning of the end).

" Are you sure you don't want to go to the match?" She persisted. I nodded glumly. As much as I would like to go to the match, there was simply too much that I had to cover for the exams and not enough time to cover it. I was curious as to how Potter was handling his studying. He was second in class and on the Quidditch team, which was supposed to be pretty intense.

Tay sighed, but knowing it would do no use to stay and try to persuade me, turned to follow Vivian to the Quidditch pitch. I listened to her footsteps fade before returning to my Transfiguration notes. Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration states that-

"Hello." It was Sev. I gasped in shock. He walked completely silently, like death's shadow. It was truly terrifying sometime.

"Merlin, don't scare me like that!" I chastised him. I clearly wasn't going to get any work done now, so I slammed my book shut with a loud thump earning a glare from the librarian. Whoops. I was here every day studying silently, well mostly silently, but he still didn't like me. Severus Snape, my best friends sat down across the table from me, allowing his robes to spill over his chair and onto the floor messily. Our robes were identical except for his had green lapels and accents whilst mine had red.

He smirked slyly. "You're not going to the match?" I asked him. It had become common curtesy to ask if one was going to the match. Quidditch was like the weather.

"C'mon. Lily, you know me. Quidditch? Me and Quidditch never really meshed very well." He reminded me. I felt bad for bringing up the matter. In our second year, Sev had fallen off his broom and was harshly ridiculed by Potter and Black, his main tormentors. That was around the time that he really came to dislike the boys.

I blushed and looked down at my book. "Well, what are you going to do today?" I asked him. So maybe I had a small hope that he had plans and would leave me to my studying, but I would never be as rude as to voice them. I liked my reputation as a very nice person. Well, I had that reputation with everyone except Potter and maybe Black, but don't get me started on them, I'll never stop.

"I'm meeting up with some other Slytherins in an hour or so." I tried to hide my displeasure at his plans my my light mein slipped and the corner of my lips twitched downward. I was glad he didn't tell me exactly what he was going to do like he used to but I had heard enough to know. He frowned at me, iritated that I had once again, whether intentional or not, had brought up my contrary opinions to his friends.

"Lily! Stop it. They're not bad. I don't know what your problem is with them." said Severus. I grinded my teeth.

"They're horrible. The magic they use is dark. Did you see what they did to that poor Dorthea Thompson girl! It was Dark Magic, Severus! You know that! You know that those Death Eaters you hang out with are bad people. Why can't you get over this obsession?" I shouted in a whisper. I knew this wasn't the way to handle it and it would not encourage Severus to drop this Dark Arts obsession he has. I did not want to get into this with Severus right now, but it seemed inevitable. I told myself that this rough patch was going to bring us closer together. Of course then I didn't know that it was going to be the death of me.

"That was just a laugh. And I don't have an obsession! And if I did what buisness is it of your what I do or who I hang out with?" He said, I knew he knew it wasn't. I just wondered how deep down the truth was.

"No! It wasn't just a laugh, and I'm you're best friend, I think that that entails some honesty. At least admit that they're bad and you are obsessed." I argued vehemently. He was denying it?

"ME! Well, who do you spend so much time with? Huh? James Potter! Arguing or not, you spend a lot of time with the prat! He fancies you, James Potter fancies you! And he's not...everyone thinks...big Quidditch hero —" I glared at him as he stumbled over his words to a extraordinarly weak argument.

"I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag. I don't need you to tell me that. And I do not try to spend time with him arguing" I cried harshly. How could he possibly think he could use that as an argument! Half the time I spent around Potter was defending Severus, and the other half was fighting with him over my own beefs with the boy. And here he was accusing me of who-knows-what!

Severus didn't have a response. He just sat there. Irritated, I snatched up my Transfiguration book and stalked out of the library very miffed.

I shoved my book into my bag as I walked down the corridor. I knew I still wasn't going to the match; I wasn't in the mood to argue with Potter. I was suddenly knocked off my feet.

"Bloody hell! I'm sorry. Oh hey Lily." It was Christian...The Gryffindor Keeper!

"Hey, what are you doing here? Your on the team! There's a match, you know!" I cried. He was dressing in his normal school robes, looking in no way shape or form ready to go to a match.

"I had detention. They had to use a sub. Marks was really mad, he hates having to replace member of the team temporarily. He says it tears down our structure or something." He told me. Marks was the current captain, he was a sixth year. "I don't need you to chew me out, too. James already yelled at me worse than Marks. Hey! And you're not my mom! I'm _your_ older brother!" He objected.

Christian didn't mean it literally, we weren't related. But in the first year, we had gotten pretty close. He was like the big brother I never had, always there beat up the bullies who messed with me. And he claims, keep all _those_ guys in line. He tells me I'm not going to have a boyfriend until I'm twenty. I always deny the fact that guys like me, they don't. Tay and Vivian tell me I'm so lucky that I have someone who cares so much for me with no drama. I have to admit I am. I love Christian like a brother, and our relationship works both ways. I don't let him go out with false or wanton girls. He teases me like a brother, and I'm just really glad I have him.

"What are you doing now? I assume your detention is over." I ask him. I internally cross my fingers, I hadn't done anything with him in several weeks and this was a great opportunity to catch up.

"I have no plans, I certainly can't go down to the match. That would just make the team angrier at me. Do you want to do something?" I immediately start thinking of fun things to do.

"I'm all for it. You got any ideas?" I look up at him. He's wearing his pondering face. Lightbulb (for me). "You want to play wizards chess?" My eyes widened with excitment.

"No!" He shouts, "You beat me everytime. It starts to rain on a guys' self esteem after a while." I roll my eyes.

"Silly Christian. Fine, we will find something else to do." I capitulate.

"How about we tease the giant squid?" I laugh remembering how it turned out last time anyone had dealt with the giant squid.

"I don't fancy going for another swim in the lake with Potter." I told him. Under provocation, the giant squid would react as we had been told, but Potter just didn't believe McGonagall. "Why don't we just head down and watch the match from afar?"

"I guess that will work, but when everyone comes out I want to be kilometers away!"

"Okay, I wouldn't want to get attacked by an entire Quidditch team either." I agreed. We turned to walk back in the direction Christian came from, towards the pitch.

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><p>As we approached the pitch, I noted what great weather it is for a match. It is overcast, and doesn't look to be rain in the near future. We situated ourselves right on the hill before the entrance, which has a shockingly great view of the match, most of which takes place slightly above the height of the stands.<p>

This match is particularly fast paced, and I knew Christian is itching to get in the game. We arrived just in time to see Potter score the last of a long series of goal, a minute or two before Marks caught the Snitch.

"Well, that was kind of a let down. I wish we'd been able to see more of the match." I complained, getting up off the ground and brushing myself off.

"Well, we'll always hear about it later. Hell, I hear about the matches and I'm on the team!" I laughed. Hogwarts did get very worked up about it's quidditch.

"C'mon. We should get going if you don't want to hear from the team." I told him though I knew that none of the team or Potter would be out for ten or twenty minutes. The team members refuse to believe they spend that much time in the locker room after a game. I also suggested leaving quickly because I did not want to have to face Vivian and Taisie about not coming to the match. Merlin knows, they'd be livid.

We raced back to the Common Room, and spent our last few moments of peace discussing our Charms lesson from the day previous, before cheering Gryffindors burst in carrying bottles of butterbeer and other bite-sized treats. I knew I should have asked them where they'd gotten them, but I really didn't feel like picking a fight. After talking with Severus, I was still sad. Arguing with Severus always ruined my day. I often argued with Potter more on those days. In fact, once while I was arguing with Severus, once again about the use of magic and the people he hangs out with, and Potter's eyes widen and practically ran the other direction. For the rest of the day, if I so much as caught one glimpse of him, he was gone the next second. Much as I may dislike the boy, he is smarter than the average bear.

_Bang. Boom. Shout. Cheer. _In an instant everyone was crawling back through the portrait hole, with the predicted drinks and food. I sighed, leaning against Christian. I really didn't want to deal with noise and people right now. And the party was just making it worse.

After saying hello to many people and having short conversations, I had an opportunity to escape the chaos that was currently surrounding me.

"Hey, Chris, come here we need your help." One of his friends called to him. He looked at me regretfully. He wouldn't leave knowing that I would be miserable all the while he was gone.

I smiled and nodded, "Oh, go on. I'm not your mother. I think I'm going to take a book down to the lake and read anyways." Satisfied that I would just sit here alone on a couch, he stood and walked over to his friend. I knew I should study, but I needed to de-stress, and reading was my best solution to that.

I took the stairs two at a time and grabbed my muggle book, _The Count of Monte Cristo, _off my night table. It was a great book, but not one you could read in lots of noise, and it kept me delightfully 'out of it' because it took to much time to follow plots and characters.

I found a comfortable tree on the hill surrounding the east side of the lake, closest to the school. I laid down the blanket I had snatched from our drawers in the dormitory and nestled into the tree, relishing the silence around me. There was no man made noise, only the birds and the light crashing of water against its containment of the lake.

I looked out across the lake. I laughed aloud, spoiling the silence, when I recalled the day Potter and I had both gotten tossed into the lake. While I had nearly cursed Potter into oblivion, for it was his fault. When I returned to the Gryffindor house, I had laughed non-stop of five minutes.

It appears that while I was reading and completely unaware of what was going on around me, people trickled into the lightly shaded spot of trees. It was a popular hang-out but I had expected it to be empty for at least until dinner. Oh fate was set against me, today. Boy, was it, and the day was only half over.

I was reluctantly pulled from my novel, when I finished it. I finished it much to quickly! I didn't want to face people yet. I did reread books but I didn't finish them and then immediately skip to the front of the book and restart. That would be someone who just needs to get a life.

It was about an hour before dinner would be served and the sun was just barely beginning to set. I heard laughter from up on the top of the hill and glanced over my shoulder to see what had caused it. I couldn't see because there was a large crowd of girls blocking my way. I sighed and gathered my things intent on walking to the library, hopeful that I wouldn't see Severus. As I passed the group of girls I could now clearly see what had caused the loud laughter.

I groaned. They couldn't leave him alone for a day could they. In front of me were the Marauders, dangling Severus upside down in the air, taunting him. I dropped my book, racing to his aid.

I reached them as Potter, 'Scourgifyed' his mouth. Pink soap bubbles poured forth from Severus's mouth, choking him. I may be angry with him but I wouldn't just leave him to the mercy of the Marauders. I was still to wonder why Remus was good friends with them. I didn't try because trying to read Remus was like trying to read a book with size 6 font, neon yellow text against a lime green background... from a mile away. One of the trickier thing one could do in life.

"Leave him ALONE!" I shouted at Potter, that cruel, evil gargoyle! He and Black both turned rapidly in my direction, Potter ruffling his hair with his free hand. Ugh!

"All right, Evans?" Potter asked in a deep and pleasant voice, a fakely mature tone.

"Leave him alone!" I cried again. "What had he done to you?" I glared at him with contempt.

"Well," Potter appeared to be stuck for a moment. "it's more the fact that he _exist_, if you know what I mean..." THe surrounding crowd laughed, Petegrew and Black included. Remus hid behind his book, though he was probably listening to the scene unfold.

"You think you're funny," I told him icily, "But you're just and arrogant, bullying, toerag, Potter. Leave him _alone_."

"I will... if you go out with me, Evans." said Potter seductively. "Go on. Go out with me and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again." I wrinkled my nose in disgust. Glancing fleetingly behind his I saw Sev crawling meekly towards his wand.

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid." I said angerly.

"Bad luck, mate," Black intoned. "OY."

Behind him Severus, had reached his wand, but it was too late. Sev had struck, there was a flash and Potter's cheek was cut open, blood dripping down his face. Potter twisted in an instant, reflexes quicker than ever. He had fine tuned them from playing Quidditch. Another flash and Severus was hanging upside down, robes falling over his head revealing a pair of skinny legs and greying undershorts. The crowd resumed it's cheering. The Marauders minus Remus roared with laughter.

I nearly laughed before remembering who this was and my intense anger with Potter. "Let him down!" I demanded.

"Certainly," Potter replied, releasing the spell. Sev crumpled to the ground in a heap, trying to free himself from his robes. Before he could return to his feet Black had body-binded him.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" I roared at Potter, whipping my own wand out. I saw Potter and Black exchange glances, they really didn't want to take me on right now.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you," said Potter warningly.

"Take the curse off him then!" I demanded. Potter sighed and let Sev down.

Potter sighed, but released the spell binding Severys.

"There you go." He told him as Sev returned to his feet, "You're lucky Evans was here Snivellus-"

"I don't ned help from filthy little Mudbloods like her." Severus said not even sparing a glance in my direction. I felt the dagger plunge through my back. I nearly gasped aloud, my resolution to not show weakness in front of Potter prevented me. My best friend had just denounced me in front of everyone. He just called me a Mudblood. I felt about to cry. I nearly sank to my knees right then and there. My best friend had deserted me. He had chosen Slytherins, evil Slytherins over me. I felt my heart scream inside of me.

"Fine," I told him, a cool mein hiding my emotions. "I won't bother in the future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus." Snape did not flinch but his eyes showed his regret. I could not forgive him, I would not forgive him. This was the end of our friendship. His Slytherin friends had finally rubbed off on him, we were done.

"Apologize to Evans," Potter roared at Snape, malice in his eyes. I was shocked that Potter was so offended, he was a pureblood.

"I don't want _you_ to make him apologize," I shouted angerly, turning on him. "You're as bad as he is..."

"What?" cried Potter, insulted while whipping the blood off his face. "I'd never call you a - you-know-what!"

"Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you're just got off you broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down the corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can- I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK!" I tell him lashing my anger out at him. I was venting, and Potter was a good target, and certainly not an innocent one by any means.

I turn and quickly walk away leaving my book behind, ignoring Potter's calls. I don't turn around for fear that Snape or Potter may see the tears streaming rapidly down my face.

Once I was inside, I ran to the sixth floor to the tapestry of the knights in battle and brushed it aside running down the passageway behind it. I ran up the stairs at the end, flight after flight until I stumbled out onto the roof of the tower, the sun setting

I fell onto the ground, removing my shoes and curling my feet under me to hug myself into a ball. My dark red tresses covering my face as I wept. Tears poured from my eyes as I mourned the lose of a best friend. I cried until my eyes were bloodshot and my skin imprinted with the pattern of the armrest on my legs. I don't know how long I laid on that tower, but it was a few hours after dinner but maybe an hour before cerfew. I finally was strong enough to stand on my feet. I blocked the agony in my heart and whipped my tears away. When I felt I could pass for just having spent a long time studying in the back of the library, I left.

I walked mindlessly down the corridors, not keeping track of the time. I wandered through the library, looking though books without really absorbing the information. I read for a half an hour about Transfiguration, before I realized that I was studying the Grawp's Laws of Elemental Transfiguration and already knew everything. I gave up on studying to take my mind of the fact that I had just lost my best friend permenantly. I was tired from crying, my stomach hurt from hunger, I looked like my hair had been run on _crush_ through a blender. I scarely remember hoping that I don't run into anyone looking like this.

I knew my friends would be anxious, having probably heard about the events earlier in the day. I knew whenever I returned to the dormitory, that they would be waiting there to comfort me, while biting their tongue to keep from saying, "We told you so." I wanted to collect myself before facing them. I would tell them I was fine, and if I looked it they would push to comfort me, but give me my space. I was only really worried about Taisie and Vivian, they would sense that I was not okay at all. They knew me well enough to know that I wouldn't be okay for a few weeks.

I though of Christian momentarily and hoped that I would be able to reach him and convince him not to act rashly, before he tracked down Snape and beat him to a pulp. I'm sure that would not solve anything. Christian's extreme protectiveness of me one day would lead to someone innocent landing in a possibly fatal condition in St. Mungo's. I won't be able to stop him every time.

Comforted by the fact that I knew all of my friends would make sure I steered clear of Snape for the rest of the year, I straightened my hair in a bathroom along the way, and headed back to the Gryffindor Common room, still only a tentative grasp on my sanity. A dramatic loss like this would easily rattle my comfortable mind, but because not being friends with Snape was the best thing for me I knew that I would be okay.

As zoned out as I was I wasn't surprised that I didn't hear footsteps approaching from in front of my. I very nearly ran into the person. When I looked up to apologize I saw a very familiar face. Potter. He looked worried and sympthetic. His dark black hair was tousled as usual, and he looked exactly as he had this afternoon in the trees.

"Hey-" He started but I cut him off. I don't know what seized me in that moment. Maybe it was a combination of hormones, grief and exhaustion. Maybe I truly did lose my sanity that day. I tossed all morals through the window when I acted on the sudden desperate impulse that coursed through me.

Before Potter could begin his sentence I rushed forward and standing on my tippy toes crushed my lips to his, wrapping my arms around his neck as I closed my eyes, bringing his head down to me. He stiffened at first, I knew he was debating whether or not he should take advantage of me like this. I guess he decided any anger I may blame on him later, it was worth it. He soon relaxed into the kiss, moving his lips in unison with mine, slowly less and less cautious. I pressed my soft, feminine figure against his hard, muscled body. I felt his toned stomach pressed against me and I lifted my hands to his hair. I curled my fingers in his soft hair and suddenly I wondered why I got on him for running his hands through his hair. I _loved_ his hair. I ran my fingers through it as he usually did. knotting them at the base of his neck. His arms wrapped around my waist tilting his head to deepen the kiss. He lifted my hips slightly so my bare toes were a few inches off the ground.

The instant our lips had touched my brain shorted out. I could see nothing, I could feel nothing but his lips on mine, his hands on my waist. It was all him and I loved it. I didn't just see fireworks, I saw _lightning_, just as bright but far more passionate. A storm of emotion. The fireworks and lightning was blinding, but I didn't care in this instant. For once, I lived in the moment.

I pulled back only when I was sure I would suffocate if I didn't, gasping from the intense kiss. He continued to hold me in his arms. I left my hands in his hair, my chest heaving against him, breathing in his scent. He smelled like grass, and rain, as if he'd just played a quidditch game in the rain; he smelled like broom oil and... arrogance? I had never been so close to anyone, fitted to their body. I could count his eyelashes. I stared into his hazel eyes.

Then reality pulled me back from this blissful dream, and I gasped in shock this time. I struggled against him, trying to touch the ground. He knew I was trying to leave and for a heartstopping second I was worried he wasn't going to let me down. Then in surrender he lowered me to my feet. I turned at ran in the direction of the common room, sparing a glance over my shoulder, I saw him watching me. His eyes followed me as I ran with such heartbreak I nearly turned around. He hadn't moved but his shoulders where lowered. Not held high like usual, with pride. He looked the picture of surrender. I didn't know what he was surrendering to.

*James*

I finally learned the difference between wild and impulsive. One could be the object of organization and schedule but still be wild. Impulse was the lack of any refrainment, acting on any thought. Wild was being uncontrollable. Lily Evans was wild. I surrendered to the fact that I would be intrigued with Lily Evans for the rest of my life, despite her wildness. Because somethings, you may try, but you can never change them and you just have to run with the punches. No matter how harsh, cruel, and breathtakingly beautiful they may be.

* * *

><p><strong>Ahhh! Que screams! They kissed, YAY! I hope you liked it a lot. I enjoyed writing it a lot. What will be the aftermath... Duhn Duhn DUUUUUUUUUHNNNNNN! Again, any suggestions to the story are welcome, and pranks. I hope to include some more of the Marauder's pranks, but I've never been gifted with coming up with them! Please help me with those! Also, I would like a Beta. I need a Beta. I'm not sure the protocol for finding one so if you'd like to do it, PM me please!<strong>

**-Scarlet4562**


	6. What Guys Want: He's Not a Nice Guy

**Please note that in the wizarding world, there are fewer people. So when you have a best friend, they are your _best _friend, and it would be a huge thing if something happened and you suddenly quit being friends. Wizards are closer because they all have a common similarity.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 7<p>

I race up the stairs back to the common room. Paintings asked me where I was going so fast at this late at night. I ignored them. I didn't want to go back to the common room, but if I returned to my sanctuary I would risk running into James again. My mind stumbled over the words in my head. Should I call him James? Or should I call him Potter?

My cheeks were flushed, from running, yes. But mostly from embarassment. I was supposed to be cool and collected, not desperate and impulsive. Merlin, why did it have to be James Potter I ran into, why not Christian or Vivian? I knew I wouldn't kiss either of them! I would never be able to face Potter again.

My anger and grief from Snape's sting was fading under the pressure of humiliation and shame. I was ashamed of my self, I was so weak that one mean word and I was flinging myself into the arms of the enemy. Tomorrow, I would no longer be the strong, independent Lily Evans. I would be just another one of the weak girls who fawned over the leading Marauders. The blood pumped even faster to my face. Ah, irrationality! Thou art a heartless bitch.

I approached the Common room cautiously, hoping that everyone had already trailed off to bed after dinner. Of course I knew this was extraordinarily unlikely. Tears began leaking down my cheeks again because of Snape, Potter, my rotten judgement.

_If there's a prize for rotten judgement,_

_I guess I've already won it._

_No man is worth this agravation_

_It's ancient history, been there done that!_

I laugh bitterly to myself at the irony of the song. Oh how well it fits the current situation. Except she was talking about falling in love, I wasn't. Was I? A few of the portraits walked along with me back to the Gryffindor Tower listening to me sing, cheering when I finally swallowed my tears and stopped.

I stopped singing when I reached to portait of the Fat Lady. Steeling myself, I wiped away any stray tears and pushed all my emotions off my face, replacing them with a look of contentment and closure.

"Courage." I said monotonously to the Fat Lady. I made a mental not to complain to Dumbledore about the simplicity of our password and its lack of protection. The Fat Lady looked at me with confusion.

"What's got your wand in a knot?" She asked kindly. I nearly lost my resolve. I added to my content mein to sound like I care to the minimum.

"I don't want to talk about it." I told her, wishing she would just let me through already.

"Well, I warn you there is a lot of noise inside. I think something happened. With the number of people in there, you may be pressed for questions." I smiled at the portrait, thankful for her warning. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that I was the reason so many people were still active in the Common Room.

"You'd better get inside. Don't want to be caught out after cerfew, which I daresay is very close." I heard footsteps approaching from the stairs I had just ascended and took her advice. The portrait hole swung open and I stepping inside.

The noise I had scarcely heard from out side was much louder now that I was in the room. As I stepped in the entire room turned to look at me. There was a moment of complete silence before the noise redouble, louder than before. I felt claustrophobic with all the people rushing at me.

"Lily, where were you?" I heard the voices from every angle. I had hands on my shoulder and was smothered in hugs. Endearing voices, and sad eyes. I knew why they were there.

"Are you okay, Lily?"

"I'm so sorry."

"I'm here for you Lily."

"He's awful. Do you want me to kick his ass?"

"C'mon. Let's get you some peace and quiet." This voise was warm and familiar. It stuck out from the crowd and I curled into it. I grabbed the hand of the person who said that and followed them. He paused along the way once to whisper to someone. "I got her. Come with me." I don't know who he was talking to. I couldn't see through the people.

I felt myself being pulled up a set of stairs by the hand gripping mine. Another hand had placed itself comfortingly on the small of my back. Tears streaked down my face again in the face of this kindness. The hands were different but the same. One was clearly masculine and strong and the other small and feminine, but they both touched me the same. With a feeling of comfort, and sympathy, and love being conveyed. I pushed thoughts of James out of my head. I could only deal with so much, so my best bet was to take it one step at a time, I decided, my logic returning to me.

We stopped, and I nearly ran into the body in front of me. It turned around. Christian. I should have known. I'm sure in my right mind that I would have, but I was too out of it to think. Only he would be so sensitive to known exactly what I needed at a time like this.

He cringed when he saw my face and it's despair. I'm sure he and everyone else in the Common Room was thinking, "Wow, she's getting worked up over nothing. It's not like someone died."

Christian stepped up to me, and swung me into his strong arms, bridal-style. The hand on my back slipped off, patting my head comfortingly before it was gone completely.

"Merlin, she is light as a feather. She should eat more!" said Christian. A door clicked when he finished this statement, and he took a few more steps. Christian laid me lightly down on the bed, pull the comforters over my trembling body. I saw faces swarming in front of me. Christian's, Vivian's, Tay's, all filled with concern before I fell deeply into an exhausted sleep.

* * *

><p>I woke bright sunlight streaming in through the windows. I sat up rubbing my eyes. Quickly, I became aware that I wasn't in my room. I remembered the night before and groaned from embarassment.<p>

I had walked back into the Common Room, been bombarded, then dragged upstairs crying. I had some serious damage control to do. Grabbing a blanket from Christian's nightstand, I wrapped it around myself while I wondered where my robes had gone. I was somewhat scantily clad underneath.

Usually under my robes, I wore jeans and a tee shirt, but yesterday I had lent two of my shirts out and my jeans were both in the laundry, so I was forced to wear my summer night sleeping clothes. A pair of way-to-short shorts and a form-fitting tank top. Making sure that the blanket was securely wrapped around me, I quietly creaked open the door to the Fifth Year's dormitory and descended the stairs.

When I reach the bottom of the stairs, no one is around. They must all be down at breakfast. A hand grabs my shoulder and I jump about a foot in the air. I whip around ready to strike if necessary.

Standing behind me, is James Potter. I freeze like a deer in the headlights. I hadn't had any time to think about the kiss. I can tell that he doesn't know what to do. Blood rushed to my cheeks faster than you can say 'James Potter' and I look down humiliated. Oh, Merlin; Oh, Merlin; oh, Merlin.

"Ummm." I start in smartly. He shifts feet and takes a step towards me while I resist the urge to take one back.

"I-" says James, but I cut him off. I decide to avoid it, I can always reconfront it later if it is really problematic.

"Look, I'm really sorry. It was a mistake, I was upset and emotional and I wasn't thinking straight. You just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and became my victim. I'm sorry." I told him, watching his face carefully.

"So. You go around throwing yourself at people often?" He asked me, smirking. He was such an ASS! My best friend just dumped me and I was emotionally unstable and he was _teasing_ me!

I swallowed my anger and replied, "Why don't we just go back to before the kiss and pretend it didn't even happen. And no mentioning it to anyone." I pleaded with him. I was _pleading_ with _James Potter_! Merlin, this day is going to the dogs. This was just something that I was going to have to swallow my pride for and ask. I'd never felt more humiliated and I felt my heart going a hundred miles an hour form embarassment. I rethought everyword I said.

"My lips are sealed." said Potter carelessly, miming zipping his lips and throwing away a key. Was he flirting with me? I pushed that away. I felt my heart inflate, I didn't have to worry about public opinions. Yay.

I turned to walk up the door to the Girls' half of the tower but Potter's foot was on top of the blanket. The blanket was yanked back, and unsuspecting me let it. Oh, crap! I ran forward to grab the blanket and retain what little modesty I had left. I felt his eyes wander up and down my physique as I lunged for the blanket. I didn't look up at his smirking and sarcastic face as I ran for the stairs. He did that on purpose, I realized angrily. I stifled it with thoughts of his promise of discrepancy.

Why did all the embarassing things in my life have to happen in front of Potter of all people.

Scrambling up the stairs, I stopped for a moment and looked back at Potter, who was watching me leave.

"Thank you, Potter." I said kindly, trying to convey my enormous thanks with my eyes. I whipped around and scrambled up the stairs to the safety of my room leaving Potter amused and arrogant, and slightly disappointed that I hadn't flung myself at him again.

Once I reach my room, I fished out my now clean jeans and a long sleeve top. I found my robes had been neatly folded and laid on my bed. I dressed in my robes and started down the stairs.

I peeked around the corner of the staircase. I would be oh so happy to live the rest of my life without ever having another awkward confrontation like with Potter. There was no one in the Common Room and I quickly passed through it and out the portrait hole.

* * *

><p>I walked into the Great Hall like it was any other morning. I saw Vivian and Taisie sitting with Aaron and made my way over, maneuvering around tables and feet. I noted that Potter and his friends are all at the table, near my friends but they seemed to be taking no notice of each other. I don't think Potter mentioned you-know-what to anyone.<p>

I sat down customarily on the side farthest from Potter and I would have sworn I saw his eyes twitch up and follow me as I took a seat.

"Hey Lily." Aaron said awkwardly. I groaned mentally, I'm sure Vivan has told him about my emotional break-down last night. Vivian and Tay look up.

Vivian across the table felt no need to voice her greetings but showed all of her sympathy through her expression of pity. I didn't like pity, I was fine people didn't need to worry.

"Hey! Lily, are you okay?" asked Tay quietly. "You want to tell us what happened?" I shook my head at her as I piled toast and bacon onto my plate.

"I'll tell you later." I told her, pleading with my eyes for her not to press it. She seemed to get my message and dropped it though I knew it would not be the end of the matter. I knew she was wondering why I was so upset; I had mentioned to them before my worry about Snape and our previous friendship. They were both shocked by my antics last night, they knew I would be upset but I don't think they predicted how much I did. But I doubt they predicted that in emotional turmoil, I would kiss James Potter either. Hopefully they would just contribute all of my tears to Snape and not suspect that something else had happened that they missed. Partially, I was in tears over what happened with Potter, much to my dismay. But I didn't take it for granted how well that turned out. There could have been very severe repercussions.

As I slathered butter onto my piece of toast, Black slid down the table to sit next to Vivian. Taisie glares at him. We had some very complex emotions running rampant among us third year girls. Vivian was in fact very good friends with Black. They had known each other a few years before Hogwarts and were fast friends. Taisie hated Black. Partially, out of loyalty to me and partially, because she feels the same way about Black for similar reasons as I feel (usually) for Potter. I have indifference towards Black, I've never discussed anything with the boy long enough to decided if I had positive or negative feeling for him. I usually dealt with Potter when I had a problem.

"How are you ladies?" asked Black smoothly. Viv smiled while Tay decided it was in her best interest to stay out of the conversation, contenting herself with looking glum until he leaves.

"Tired of studying!" Vivian exclaimed. I rolled my eyes at her. She would be thankful she studied later.

"Studying? For what?" Black asked, feigning confusion.

Vivian decided to play along, "Why for the exams, Silly... You know, the ones _today!_" She said stressing her point.

"Oh, right." said Black as if he'd known all along. "I don't need to study. I'm just that smart!" However rude it may have been, Vivian and Taisie scoffed. Taisie because she didn't believe it, Vivian because she was joking. It was funny how the exact same scoff and set such different tones.

Black seemed not to have noticed. At that moment, a tall girl with long curly brown hair walked by. I recognized her, she was a fifth year Ravenclaw. Black wolf-whisted at her.

"You know where to find me." said Black seductively, winking at the girl. I began to wonder if he could say anything without some underlying implications or seduction. The girl turned to back so I didn't get to see how she responded, but directly in my line of vision was, however, Vivian. Her eyes flickered with distaste as she watched Black hit on the fifth year. Having known her for nearly four years, I read her like a book. Under the disgust was strong jealousy. Vivian had a crush on Black, I wondered how long this had been going on and decided to recall it later, when I needed a subject change for why I was upset.

As the fifth year left the Great Hall, Black turned back around.

"Hey, did any of you happen to see James yesterday, sometime after the..." He trailed off but we all knew what he was refering to. My heart started pounding, Potter had told. Why would he do that? We were doomed.

Vivian looked up from incinerating her scone with her brain and raised an eyebrow. "No, why?" She asked curiously. The Marauders were tight, one asking where the other was was suspicious, unless of course you knew where they were and weren't telling how or why.

"A few minutes after carrot-top here," said Black gesturing at me. I refrained from glaring at him with the annoying use of an insulting nickname. "walked back in we finally found him. He just slowly walked into the Common Room. Eyes wide, the man looked like ... ah... I don't really knoww what he looked like. He was just... James. Wouldn't answer any of our questions as to why. Evan, you sure you didn't see anything? He must have been a staircase behind you."

I kept the blood from rushing to my cheeks and resisted the urge to run out of the Great Hall like a madwoman, any dignity flushed down the drain. "Nope. Can't say I was really paying attention though." I said knowing I had stuck just the right cords and they wouldn't want to pressure the sensitive subject right now. Well, Black wouldn't.

"Well, we'll find out eventually. Maybe yesterday was just an off day for everyone." He said glancing conspiciously at me. I shoveled the rest of the food in my mouth desperate to leave the awkward table.

"Well, I have some major studying to make up. Yesterday certainly put a kink in my plan. I'm off." Tay heard the underlying message. 'Don't bother me about yesterday, I will be busy.' She nodded faintly. I left the Great Hall, glancing at Potter along the way before proceeding to the Gryffindor Tower to retrieve my books.

* * *

><p>With a sigh of relief, I closed my Transfiguration text book, and neatly replaced my notes. Outside the sky was dark and stormy, it was nearly five o'clock and my stomach had been growling since mid-day when I decided to bypass lunch so I could finish my studying. I wished there was somewhere in this school where you could get a snack in between meals, unfortunately no such luck.<p>

I eased my textbook and notes back into my shoulder bag and stood up. Intending to return to the Common room and read a book I headed in the direction of the Gryffingor Tower. I'm in sight of the Great Hall when a dreadful voice call out from behind me.

Why can't someone just approach me from the front for once why does everything have to sneak up on me. Would it really be the end of the world?

"Lily?" Snape asked tenderly. I felt my insides sear with rage. How dare he! I spun on my heel to glare at him with utmost hatred. He's dressed in his standard black work robes with an apologetic look on his face.

"What?" I nearly shouted, throwing my arms up. He cringed at my agressive greeting. "Come to apologize? Well, I don't accept!" I tried to stare him down but he wouldn't meet my gaze. Coward.

"I'm sorry, Lily. It was an accident. I didn't mean it! Please forgive me." He sounded sincere.

"Why is it an accident? You call everyone of my parentage, a Mudblood." He flinched at the use of the word. "Why not call me what you think, what you know I am?" I asked him. I knew he didn't have an answer.

He looked at his shoes. I shake my head, though I'm glad that no one is here to ridicule his cowardliness.

"Wasn't it you who always told me, that the fact that my parents were muggles wasn't important? What happened to that, huh? You have nothing to say for yourself. No defense for your actions?" I asked him. He tracks me down, infuriates me, and doesn't even defend himself.

"Go run along to your Death Eater friends, Snape." I sneer. I hate sneering, it's such a condescending gesture, but I was too angry to stand by my morals and standards.

"Lily, I'm so sorry. I just- I mean I'm- I didn't - I don't-" He stumbled over his words for a moment or two before I took pity on him.

"Are you still intending on becoming one of these so called 'Death Eaters'" I asked him sadly.

His gaze which had wandered up at my kind tone, immediately shot back to his feet. He skidded the shoes over the rough ground.

"Well, yeah. I do plan on..." said Snape trailing off. I knew what he meant. Shaking my head of the thought, I looked at him sadly until he wonders why I have stopped talking and glanced up.

"Why can't you just get over them? Why are you so hung up on who I hang out with?" said Snape in a spasm of defense.

"They're the reason you use the word 'Mudblood.' They play cruel jokes on people-" I'm cut off.

"So does 'Quidditch hero James Potter!'" He retorted. A blood vessel nearly burst in my eye.

"AND AS YOU CAN SEE I CAN'T MUCH STAND HIM EITHER! WHY ARE YOU SO OBSESSED WITH MY RELATIONSHIP WITH JAMES POTTER!" I shouted hoping my tone didn't give away what happened.

Snape knew me too well. He narrowed his eyes. "What happened!" He demanded to know.

"None of your buisness, what goes on in my life. You lost that right the moment that word passed your lips." I told him, angry now also that despite our obvious terminating friendship he still felt he had the right to inquire about my personal life.

"Bloody hell!" shouted Snape somewhat randomly. Bloody hell it right. Excuse my profanity.

"I don't care what you think anymore! You can go run off with your Death Eaters, I don't give a damn." I cried hopelessly. His face returned to its original pleading look. The look which I carefully ignored.

"I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just —" I cut him off furiously. I didn't want his apologizees, I was done. With no emotion in my voice I delivered my final blow.

"Slipped out? It's too late! I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you! You and your precious little Death Eater friends ... You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine." And with that I ended our friendship officially, I knew he knew there was no repairing it and I could see the anguish in his eyes. I was very good at reading people, but I would not renew our friendship. I didn't even experience the slightest impulse to, like I had when he had first said it. I was no longer friends with Severus Snape. That would please many of the Gryffindors. I turned and strode away.

"Lily!" Snape called after me sounding heartbroken but I kept walking. I was done with Severus Snape.

* * *

><p>I've decided that walking in the halls is now classifyed on my list of activites as 'Dangerous.' Within the past two days, I had one ran into arch nemesis, two kissed arch nemesis, three ran into ex best friends and made things official. I shall never set foot in another hall way again.<p>

With Snape behind me and dealt with, I hurry back to the Gryffindor Tower. If I tell Vivian and Taisie, and get it over with before exams I will be a happy camper. I don't want any of _this_ to shape my life. I've already got it planned out.

I walked over the treshold of the Gryffindor Tower to see a much calmer gathering than the night before. Aaron and a second year were playing wizards chess in the corner by the stairs and Remus was sitting in one of the comfortable chairs by the fire. A few other randoms were scattered about looking at text books or speaking with friends. Potter and Black were pouring over large pieces of paper on a table, speaking quietly. That didn't look good.

I walk over casually, to see what they are doing. I highly suspect that they weren't Charms notes. When I'm a few feet from them, I see a wand swish rapidly and then disappear. The parchment now probably held study notes or Quidditch sketches. I sigh, the key is to sneak up on them, catch them in the act. I know they sat in the corner ot prevent that and to gain some privacy. There was no evidence therefore nothing I could do.

Letting out a breath I turned instead towards the Girls' Dormitory. I waited for a large group of sixth years' to descend the stairs before ducking up the stairwell.

When I reached the third years' dorm, I walked cautiously inside, prepared to be bombarded with questions. But curiously enough the only person in there was Nikki, sitting on the edge of her bed, a sheet of mid-length burnette hair blocking her pretty face.

"Oh, hey." I said surprised. Nikki didn't really spend _any_ of her spare time in the dorm. I rarely ever saw her and the only times I did was because I was a awake and she was asleep or if she was here with Samantha. Those two were pretty close friends, attatched at the hip.

"Hullo, Lily." She said glumly. I'd never seen Nikki glum in the time that I had known her. She was always perky Nikki, upbeat Nikki, never glum.

"Is something wrong?" I ask her tentatively. I didn't like getting in fights, but if there was every anything to do to prevent or end one I'd be there in a heartbeat. Fights with Potter excluded of course.

"It's nothing, I'm fine." She said brushing it off. I knew sometimes these things need time, but I also knew that sometimes the people involved just need to talk and rationalize. In this case I think Nikki just needed to talk, but it may take some light pushing for her to disclose information.

"I don't think so. You're usually so cheery, what's wrong?" I asked again, subtly forceful.

"I said it's nothing!" She said angerly. I nodded softly, before grabbing a book off of my night table and starting towards the door.

I knew she was going to call me back because she had snapped at me. Some people don't deal with guilt very well. She was feeling that I had done nothing to her. I technically had invaded her privacy slightly. But she needed to rant and I was offering.

"Lily, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lash out at you. I'm just having a rough day, well week." explained Nikki. I walked back to her side.

Patting her shoulder I said softly, "What happened?" You just have to be gentle with these things.

"Samantha and I are fighting." said Nikki. I nodded sympathetically. Fights with best friends are always the worst, I should have assumed. I had gotten in fights with Taisie a lot.

"You want to tell me what about?" I asked her cautiously. She seemed to contemplate it for several moments before responding.

"Nah, you will think it's rubbish." she stated. Well that peaked my curiousity. I continued rubbing soft circles on her back and give her an understanding look.

"I'm sure I won't." I told her confidently.

"Well, we're kind of fighting over a guy." She whispered her face turning red. I brushed her hair back in a motherly way.

"Why would I think this is dumb?" I asked confused.

She mumbled something inaudibly.

"Sorry I didn't catch that." I said gently.

"It's James Potter." She said in a sudden flow of words. I stiffen but continue to stroke her hair automatically. My mind flashed instantly to the kiss. It wasn't jealousy, but awkwardness. The kind one would have if you were secretly dating a guy that your best friend confessed to crushing on. I didn't say anything for a minute. She looked up at me. Her eyes were wide, innocent but distressed.

"I don't think that's rubbish. I may not like him, but I can see the appeal to some." I agree.

"Really?" I nod. "The thing is that I think I like him. And I want to ask him out. Power to the women, right?" She laughed and I did too. She was teasing me about my independence as a woman. Being independent of men is a belief of mine that Potter doesn't much care for.

"Emmeline Pankhurst, as I live and breathe." I told her holding my right hand up.

"This is kind of embarassing, seeing as he's a man whore. Don't get me wrong, I think he's going to say no unless I offer to sleep with him but I just want to put my cards on the table, you know?" She smiles. I do know, I just haven't found the right guy yet. "And Samantha likes him too. And when I told her that I planned to ask him out, she said some pretty cruel things. I just don't feel great." She groaned and fell over sideways, so she was laying on the bed.

"It's going to be okay. Maybe just let her ask him out and see where it goes. If he doesn't like her he'll say no, or if he does maybe you should just let the chips fall where they may. If he says no to her, then you could rush to comfort her. I bet that when she feels recovered, she may have some animosity towards him, but won't mind if you ask him out." I advised her.

"You think?" She asked me. I see the movie scene in my head. The daughter looks to the mother, 'You think?' and the mother smiles, 'Honey, I _know_.' I don't say that though. I don't want to be patronizing.

"Yes." I said slowly. "Fix yourself up and lets go to dinner. It should have started by now." She brushed her hair out of her eyes and stood. I had to look up at her. She towered over me at least three fourths a foot taller than me. Why was everyone taller than me?

I turned towards the door but a pair of arms catch me before I can slip away.

"Thank you, Lily. You really are as kind as everyone says." I hesitantly twist in her arms and hug her back. Do people really say that? I'll bet Potter doesn't.

I released her and she brushes out her robes before heading down to dinner.

* * *

><p>I saw Samantha sitting in her usual spot next to Vivian's usual spot when we walked in. The Great Hall was in the midst of dinner when the most people where here. Usually towards the beginning and end, there are fewer. People are arriving late or leaving early to study or sleep.<p>

"Should I still sit there?" Nikki asked me. I guess I'm now the advise column. I don't mind though, peaceful solutions are my favorite.

Nikki sits down and I sit in Taisie's usual spot to be next to her. As a non-observant girl, Samantha doesn't notice my new place.

"Nikki!" sneered Samantha. Nikki frowned sadly but moved on to her meal.

Vivian slid into the seat on the other side of the table with an impatient glance at me. "Where have you been?" She hissed.

"I was in the library most of the day. And then came back to the Gryffindor Tower to talk to you finally, but you weren't there so I came down to dinner with Nikki." I explained leaving out the part about Nikki's problem or my fight with Snape. I added Snape's argument to the list of things I needed to catch my best friends up on.

Vivian rolled her eyes. "An hour ago we went to the library to find you so we could all go to dinner together, but you weren't there. And then on our way down I got sidetracked and Taisie went to check the Tower. I assumed she'd found you and was at dinner so I came here, clearly she's not. We haven't seen you all day! Have you really been studying?" I vaguely wondered if she had listened to me at all when I explained where I was.

"I'll tell you later, before we go to bed I promise." I gave her a meaningful look. She was getting irritated at my persistent unintentional evasiveness. I would have to apologize for that again later.

"Here she is now." I pointed out upon seeing Taisie stride quickly through the doors of the Great Hall. Her newly cropped short black hair was swishing around her shoulders, and her skin seemed even paler in the lighting.

When she got to our table I said, "Vi already got on me. I'm going to tell you later, really."

"I don't mind, you need time. I get it." Taisie said generously. This is why we are such good friends. Tay and I are very similar people, we are not impatient at all, which is a huge factor in our relationships with everyone. Vivian is one of the least patient people I know, she must be screaming inside at her lack of valid information on yesterday's events.

"Thank you, but I'm going to. I've coped with everything, I'm not trying to avoid you!" I promised. I would tell them now but I didn't want everyone at the Gryffindor table to know what happened and my reaction.

"Shh. Lily, calm down. Eat, we will get to it eventually." Tay compromised sending a look at Vivian. We discussed other things, lighter topics while we ate. I spent a good fifteen minutes lecturing them on the importance of good meals and sleep before exams and that studying _was _relevant! A point that Sirius Black, slid down the table to dispute. Potter kept his distance, unusually. We weren't really sure where we stood with each other after our conversation and kiss. Tay and Vi both noticed but I hoped they attributed it to Potter's involvement in the ending of my friendship with Snape.

We finished our meal quickly and as soon as Black returned to the Marauders, headed up to the dormitory. Before leaving I sent a sympathetic look at Nikki. That was going to be an awkward end-of-meal, maybe they would work it out. I doubted that it would be worked out tonight. Since Nikki and Samantha weren't going to doddle at the table exchanging pleasantries, we had little time to recount the events.

We raced up the main stairs to the Gryffindor Tower, not speaking until we arrived.

* * *

><p>"Spill!" Vivian demanded. We were all sitting on my bed in the Third Years' dormitory. I glanced at each of them before jumping into the story.<p>

I told them everything from walking down to the trees to right before talking with Nikki. It was her problem, not mine to publicize. I did leave out the part about talking with Potter and kissing Potter. Kissing Potter. Kissing James. I didn't know what to call him now. If things go back to normal, which I hope they do, I will be able to stick to Potter. I'm not even going to consider the other option. It is not an option.

When I finished recounting my story, I gushed my emotions. How I felt about everything. They paid rapt attention and asked all the right questions.

"Where do you think you stand with Potter now?" Tay asked. I shrugged.

"I don't know. I hope everything goes back to normal. I wish he hadn't been there when Snape said _that._ I felt so weak, and that is exactly what Potter likes to prove. He thinks a woman needs a man to stand up for her. But I don't!" I said. Vivian patted my back.

"I know, Sweetie." She comforted. "I'm sure it will. Just give it time. It's only been one day. Who knows? Maybe tomorrow morning, he will come up with another, even more romantic way to asking you out." She waggled her eyebrows. Viv thinks I should just date him, so what if he has a big head.

"I don't know. He really outdid himself last time. Standing up at breakfast and serenading her. And then rose petals fell all around you and you had rose petals turning into a walkway for the rest of the day." She said. I could recall other times when he had been even more romantic, but let her have her way. What they didn't know was that Potter had planned it with his best friends knowing that it would only humiliate me and that while most other girls who were hoodwinked by his asking me out, I knew he wasn't asking for a date, he was asking for kissing after the date.

"Oh, yah and then I recall you shouting at him for a flat hour." She said eyeing me accusingly.

"He won't give up and he knows I hate him. He's looking for rejection. Plus he was an awful singer." I added. I felt bad, though it was only indirectly relation to the converstion. Potter talk kept reminding me of the fact that Nikki had a huge crush on Potter and I felt like I was betraying her by his unceasing advances.

"So you must tear the guy's self esteem down even more?" Vivian asked, gaping at me. She was making me sound like the bad guy.

I was spared a response by Samantha bursting through the door in a huff. She quickly got dressed in her nightclothes and with a flick of her wand turned all the lights out. We were already dressed for bed.

"Well, goodnight." I whispered to them as they each slid off my bed walking lightly to their own beds. I laid under the covers considering everything for an hour before reminding myself that if I didn't go to sleep that moment I would ruin my exam plan.

I awoke briefly a short while later to the door opening and Nikki slipping into her own bed.

I did not dream of exams that night. I dreamt of James Potter.

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><p><strong>Thank you, readers. I hope you like it. Any ideas for pranks again or non stereotypical occurances. What do you think? Review Review Review Please!<strong>

**-Scarlet4562**


	7. Who's Your Daddy? Where's Your Family?

**Okay hope you liked the last chapter. I once again encourage reviews. You have no idea what they mean to an author. We always appreciate feedback!**

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><p>I slammed the door to the dormitory. "Arg, I hate James Potter!" I shouted to the world, or in this case Samantha. She glanced up from her book.<p>

"Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to disrupt you." I told her, ceasing momentarily in my verbal assault on Potter.

"Don't worry, I was just leaving, I have a feeling its going to get a bit louder in here. Feel free to curse at whom ever you'd like." said Samantha, gathering her things. "He's really not that bad you know."

"Well, I _am_ one of the only girls here not infatuated with that arrogant prat. But I still think he's insufferable." I disagreed. She picked up her bookbag and started walking towards the door. It burst open, narrowly missing hitting her. With large grins on their faces, Vivian and Taisie entered.

"You should have seen people's faces. Partially relief that things were back to normal, but some shock too. Wouldn't you say Vivian?" Taisie mocked.

"Yes, definitely. It's not every day that you see, the one and only, the perfect, the intelligent, the reasonable, the _calm_ Lily Evans," replied Vivian, souding like the Quidditch announcers.

"STORM THROUGH THE COMMON ROOM, CURSING EVERYTHING TO HELL." They collapsed in laughter. "My, Lily, you should have seen their faces! Priceless!" I had to grin. It did sound funny. If I hadn't been so angry, I may have seen their faces.

With wide but amused eyes, Samantha slipped through the door and down the stairs.

"So, what has got your wand in a knot?" Taisie asked sarcastically, her large eyes looking down at me with barely supressed histerics.

I gave her a look, "James Potter, who else. You know, I really hate him but I'm glad things are back to somewhat normal after the whole Snape drama." I said this nonchalantly. When in company, I blamed problems with Potter on the Snape situation despite that had it only been my disconnection with Snape, Potter and I would be on the same page again. Though it was no where gone anytime soon, I was slowly getting over it. The kiss with Potter was going to take a bit longer.

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><p><em>I walked out of the Great Hall grasping my book and notes firmly in each hand. Ahead of me, a fourth year boy with blonde hair walked quickly towards an unknown destination. Unfortunately for him, Potter was leaning against a column with Sirius Black waiting for Remus to exit the Hall. <em>

_In my peripheral vision, I caught Potter throw a glance at Black. One that was returned with an expression of pure boredom. Potter whispered something to Black who nodded eagerly, eyeing the surrounding students._

_Black usually tried not to irritate me because he only found my venemous disagreement annoying, rather than Potter who found it enjoyable. His eyes must have slipped over my red hair because in air of recent events, he wouldn't have provoked me. Potter's eyes did not. His eyes locked with mine for a minute and I think he looked conflicted. I knew what he was thinking about. The recent complication in our relationship. I was thinking of it, too._

_Black's eyes landed on the boy in front of me as the object of their torment. Elbowing Potter, he glanced at the boy and with a flick of his wand had knocked the boy over and his face broke out in large, purple boils. My eyes widened as I glared at Potter._

_Vaguely I heard Black groan, "Bloody hell, did you not see Evans either?" _

_Without losing eye contact with me Potter replied, "Must've missed her." Then it clicked. Potter had specifically done this to attempt to restore our troubled relationship to how it was before. That was kind of... nice?_

_Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did I just associate James Potter? with the word nice? _

_Thinking strong team effort thoughts, I marched over to Potter. The nice thing to do would be to help him with his attempt. Channeling my anger into a more constructive, relationship restoring force, I stopped in front of Potter and used my momentum to strike him across the face._

_CRACK! _

_The noise rang out and echoed off the stone walls of the corridor, and Potter grabbed at his cheek._

_"WHY do you do that, Potter? You ENJOY humiliating people? Is it some kind of sadistic hobby?" I shouted in his face. He flinched and frowned at me. _

_"No." Potter replied, short and sweet. No stinging comback at all?_

_"Then quit doing it!" I hissed at him. He just smirked. Swoon. Wait - WHAT? _

_"No can do, Evans. No one said you had to watch or come and attack me because you disagree with my entertainment." Said Potter casually. _

_"Enteratainment!" I sputtered. _

_He lowered his voice to a whisper and bent his head down to my ear. Which was quite a ways to bend, more than a foot difference in our heights. I nearly grinned to see him have to go out of his way so I could hear him. My urge to grin quickly faded when I hear what he had to say."Then again, that's not the only reason you've _attacked _me." he said suggestively. The blood rushed to my cheeks for embarrassment and anger. How dare he bring that up. The audacity._

_There must be some rule about using things done will mourning against said mourning person!_

_"You!" I cried. Frustration had taken to a concrete resemblence in the form of James Potter._

_"Yes, and I'm sure that there are a few gossipers in this hall who would delight in carrying the information that Lily Evans is secretly pinning after James Potter." He waggled his eyebrows before straightening to his daunting height. _

_"I am _not!_" I glared up at him. But knew to keep my mouth shut. Biting my lip was the hardest thing ever. I've never easily been told what to do, especially by someone my own age as rude and arrogant and cocky and concieted as James Freaking Potter. But if I wanted to keep my pride, for the moment I had to swallow it and keep quiet, no matter how much it went against my nature. Resisting the urge to kick him in the chin or somewhere more painful I looked up at him to see what he would do. _

_The only times that I resented my lack of height was when I had to argue and I was shorter than that person. Though the only person I seeemed to argue with was James Potter and inconveniently, he was more than a entire foot taller than me. Heels weren't my thing and still wouldn't have changed my disadvantage much at all. _

_"See no problem. I knew you'd see my way, Evans." Potter smirked._

_I shrieked and raised my hand again before letting it fall. I strode away angrily. _

_Vaguely I heard Black ask Potter, "What was that about?" _

_His response, "Nothing much. I've just got a little bit of blackmail on goody-two-shoes Evans." I didn't stay to see if he kept to his promise of silence. _

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><p>I retold what had happened, excluding any parts pretaining to the kiss.<p>

"You do know that you have been continuously fighting for about three and a half years! Which is not only exhausting for you but annoying for some of the people around you." Vivian bluntly.

"'I'm sorry. I didn't realize my standing up for those Potter torments was annoying you. How inconsiderate of me." I said sarcastically.

"I didn't mean it like that." She groaned.

"Well, tell me. How did you mean it."

"I just meant that you and Potter are always at each other's necks. And then you come complain to us about him, and it's the same thing all the time. Why can't you just agree to disagree, and get over it."

I was insulted by statement, which I received as her claiming that the things I was standing up for were stupid. I glared at her.

"I have to go study for my last exam." I said coldly. I grabbed my bookbag from where it had fallen off the bed, and turned on my heel out of the room.

* * *

><p>An hour after I'd arrived at the library, Tay came up to comfort me. I had tucked myself away in the most secluded part of the library, by the history books, the only exam that had been taken and finished by every student. So no one would need to come in here. I had my hair thrown up in a miserable messy bun, removed my robes and kicked my feet up on the table. The uniform under was rather casual, just a pleated skirt and a plain shirt with no words. The uniforms were hardly ever seen. I felt... uncovered without the robe and not in my dormitory room.<p>

"She's just jealous, you know." Tay informed me. I jumped to my feet in surprise, I hadn't heard her approach. It that a class they teach for those priorly informed of the magic descendents, the art of sneaking? Nobody walked loudly except for the small boy, Peter Pettigrew.

"Jealous? Why would she be jealous?" I was confused.

"She's liked Potter for as long as you've hated him. She wouldn't tell you because she though you would tell her it was stupid." I frowned, hurt. Vivian hadn't told me she liked Potter. I guess it made sense but I was still hurt. I hated Potter but she was one of my best friends, they come before almost anything. I could deal with her liking Potter. Then I stopped. It wasn't my place _to deal_ with it. It's her life, her crush. I guess I wasn't offended or insulted but I was still a bit hurt.

"I wouldn't say it was stupid. I'd not agree but I'd keep it to myself. Am I that mean? Besides, I thought she liked Black." I asked.

"No, no, no. I know you wouldn't have said anything and kept your judgement to yourself, but she just did want to anyways. I don't think there was fault on either side. And as far as Black goes, she got over him when she found him making out with Samantha in the Common Room.." She smiled shyly at me. I nodded.

"Thanks, Taisie. I guess I'll quit bad-mouthing Potter when Viv's around." Taisie raised an sculpted eyebrow and resisted the urge to scoff. Well, not so much resist as make obvios that she wanted to.

"Fine!" I laughed. "As unlikely as it is, I will try."

"So why did this particular fight irritate you so much?" Taisie asked. I knew she didn't really want to know but she was just nice like that.

"Nothing really. Every few fights or so it builds up and explodes. Just because he's got some money doesn't mean that he gets everything he wants and can throw around whomever he'd like."

"You do know his father is The Dylan Potter. They don't just have some money. They could buy out the Ministry of Magic." My jaw dropped. He was related to Dylan Potter. He's probably had someone waiting on his hand and foot since he could crawl. Maids and money and anything he wanted. Stupid, spoiled, arrogant boy!

"Whatever he still shouldn't get everything he wants just because he can bribe someone. Dammit. Why is it the arrogant or the mean or the gorgeous people who have all the luck?" I groaned. "It is _so_ not fair!"

Tay reached over and rubbed my back. "At least you're not one of the girls that throw themselves at him just to reap the benefits of his fortune. They are very nearly prostitutes."

"Yes... Ugh, it's still not fair."

"Hon, hasn't anyone told you, life's not fair." I laugh sardonically, then stand up

"I think I'm gonna head up to the dorm and study in bed." Though it's very unlikely I will get any studying done, I can try. Potter will probably occupy most of my mind as he's taken to doing lately.

"I'll be down here a bit longer. G'night, Lily." Taisie stretches up in her chair to give me a hug.

I didn't get to any studying and I didn't come to any conclusions about the Potter conundrum. Glad that I'd gotten all of my studying done earlier, I fell into a restless sleep. I guess the fake fight today didn't make our relationship return to normal to me, probably not him either. The only people it effected were those watching it, who were thankful that the return-from-calm argument was over and not to disasterous.

* * *

><p>I slipped out of my seat and into the rush of students, thrilled to be done with my exams. My charms final was so easy, I don't even think I'm going to review my answers afterwards.<p>

The Great Hall was already crowded when I arrived, taking my customary spot on the opposite side of Potter.

"How did you think your Charms went?" I asked everyone.

To my surprise, Potter answered me. "I think they went okay." Was he being... modest? "I aced Transfigurations though. Easy as pie." Sigh.. I guess that was a lot to ask.

"Cocky prick." I muttered under my breath.

Obviously, he heard and replied, "Self-righteous know-it-all."

"Would you two cut it out!" Vivian and Taisie intoned at the same time. Surprisingly Potter looked down along with me. His usual would be a 'you're not the boss of me' stare down.

Odd.

"Could we spend the last two days of meals _without_ listening to you argue about inconsequential things. Yes, he's arrogant, and yes, she's a know-it-all. We've known that for three years, you think you would have dealt with it by now!" Vivian shouted. Surrounding students that had begun to stare at our little scene made hushing noises at Viv.

"SEXUAL TENSION ALERT!" Black cried, his normal usual crude self. His blue eyes were alight with humor. Vivian and Taisie laughed along with him, enjoying our embarrassment.

Potter and I whipped our heads up, with wide-eyes. Blood rushed to my face and I jolted my head back down. We only resisted shouting 'NO!' like two-year-olds because we knew that would only draw suspicion to ourselves.

I glanced at Potter and met his eyes, confusion passing betwen us. Was this what it was going to be like, awkward glances around good-hearted jokes. More argumentative than we were before any of this started. As much as we hated each other I really hoped not.

Breakfast finished in silence and I nearly ran out the doors of the Great Hall. I've unfortunately found myself doing that pretty often. Curse James Potter. I was thankful that on the first day of school I'd chosen to sit rather away from him.

I was headed to the tree where I studied when an arm grabbed me and yanked me behind a stone wall. I gave a mightly squeak before I was promptly shoved against it, arms pinned to my side.

To my surprise but not shock, I was staring into the face of James Potter. Perfection has taken form... Flutter. Oh, shut up, hormones.

Before a straight thought could cross my mind, he was leaning. Just like before my mind shorted out as soon as our lips met. The only thought in my head was, ahhhhhhh.

He ground me up against the wall, moving his calloused fingers from my arms to my waist then the small of my back. He pulled me against him with his hand on my back. My lips moved awkwardly against his trained ones. And I gasped away for air long enough for a clear through to cross my mind. Stupid player. I was being played.

I gasped and struggled away from him. His hands were forceful, not releasing me.

"Potter!" I said sternly, short of breath. With a sigh of surrender, he let go, moving his hands to my hips but not letting me pull away. As much as I hated it, I was _so_ comfortable in his arms, held in an endearing sort of way. I felt safe. With my insecurity and lack of self-image, it was a weird feeling. And I felt like I was on Cloud Nine, partiallly from the kiss and partially from just being here with him, so close to him. Oh, Merlin. I feel like a love-struck teenager. I will not turn into one of his sluts.

"Well, there's certainly chemistry." He said roughly.

"No! I'm not one of the slutty girls you hang with. I don't sleep with guys on the first date. And I am only thirteen! I do not intend on turning into one of the love-struck blondes that follow you around, and I certainly won't be played. I made a mistake, and you're making it impossibly hard to move on." It's irritating all the girls. Half of them like Sirius Black because he's smooth and gorgeous. The other half like Potter because he's rich and ruggedly handsome, and as rumors have it, he's supposed to be better than Black in bed.

For god sake, he's fifteen! Lucky bastard. Did I just say that? Am I jealous of Potter? Hell, yeah. The boy had everything at his fingertips. Grrr.

"Then don't." Potter said seductively.

"I am barely fourteen. You're almost fifteen. You are much older than I and you are _trying_ to take advantage of me. You just want me for sex, like those other girls, and I don't intend on giving that to anyone for a while! Now _please_ leave me alone."

"A while being how long?" He asked.

I gasped, still struggling, "James Potter! I don't care how much money or looks or seduction you have. I would never go out with you!"

The clack of shoes around the corner gave me the strength to finally shove him off and glare at him from a distance.

A perky fifth year blonde from Hufflepuff rounded the corner. Her eyes lit up when she saw Potter.

"James..." She dragged out his name. Swinging her hips, she strode twards him. She put the palms of her hands on his chest. "How are you?"

Her voice was thick with implications, she hadn't even seen me here. She leaned towards his head and whispered something that I couldn't hear. I stood there motionless, to see if he would accept the invitation. I knew what she was offering, didn't have to hear it to know.

His eyes met mine across the corridor. I could see the question. Was I sure?

I didn't have to think for a second. How could he possibly think... I was thirteen for god's sake. One thing on his mind, the stupid sex addict.

I scoffed, "I'll just be leaving now." The girl, whose name I think is Meredith, didn't even flinch. As I left I saw the look in Potter's eyes and shivered.

It was his 'I'm a bajillionaire, and I can make you do anything I want you to' look. He'd given me the look at the beginning of our relationship. But as soon as he decided it was fun to argue and irritate me the look stopped to. I'd seen him give the look to other students before. It was the only time I'd ever truly been frightened around him. He really could do whatever he wanted. The boy was used to getting his way and his daddy would pay for him to get it. The other students, who'd received the look had various things happen. One was in the hospital for three months, one got kicked out of school, one had an emotional breakdown and was on a temporary leave that started two years ago and, the other was a pureblood, who fell in love with a muggle and was disowned and kicked to the streets to fend for himself. We never heard from the last one after that. Though it was love, I still think Potter had something to do with it.

I didn't want to be the next one gone. And the boy had all resources available to him.

"Bye, whatever." I didn't stick around to see what happened between the two of them.

Okay, my crush on Potter. Definitely over. Who does that? Hit on one girl then in front of her, proceed in nearly having sex with another. Is there a disease known for compulsive flirting?

But honestly I was more worried about his look.

* * *

><p>"What kind of a person does that?" I said to Vivian. I'd just reaccounted the events prior, substituting heavy flirting for kissing.<p>

"Well, it is James Potter, who is best friends with Sirius Black. The BIGGEST player this school has ever seen." She tried to sooth me. "But since when do you care? You know what he's like. None of that's going to change suddenly." She was right. Why was I worried? Maybe it was the fact that he was so hot and cold it was intriguing. With his sensitive, I'm sorry I ruined your friendship with him, to his, I'm going to shag this girl right in front of you, persona. It was downright irritating.

"I guess. I'm just tired. This year has been exhausting."

"We have to get up early tomorrow morning for the train." Taisie said encouragingly.

I laughed, "Fine. G'night." I sat back in bed and much to my displeasure I fell asleep for the seventh time in the week thinking of James Freaking Potter.

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><p>I rushed into my parents arms when we unloaded the train. The ride had been uneventful for the most part and I was anxious to get home.<p>

"Oh, my gosh. I've missed you so much. How've you been?" I trilled, a few octaves too high.

"Shhh, there go my eardrums. Bring it down a bit, love." My dad said.

I giggled, "I've missed you guys."

"We've missed you too." My mom assured me.

Over her shoulder a pair of familiar eyes watched me attentively. He didn't appear to be standing with parents. A tall man in a dark suit approached him and motioned with his hands. Potter nodded solemnly and followed the man to the road where a tinted limosine was waiting. The man held the door open and took his trunk and they were off.

The man was obviously not a parent nor a friend. Hell, he didn't even appear to be an aquaintance. It was sad. And for a moment I felt sorry for James Potter.

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><p>Okay first chapter of the summer! Whoot. Whoot. Review Review Review<p> 


	8. She Did WHAT? With WHO?

**I'm sorry this took so long. School just started again and I've got more time to write, while avoiding school work! **

**Warning: This story is going to contain sexually explicit material later on. I'm warning you now. I will change the rating and mark out the parts with the material so you can read around it if you wish. Just a heads up, that as a story about 'Enemies with Benefits', you should expect a certain amount of... material not appropriate for all age groups.**

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><p>Summer passed, mindnumbingly dull. I wrote letters to all of my friends for most of the week, frustrated that I'd decided on a cat, Machi, rather than an owl. I couldn't initiate any conversation, I had to wait for letters.<p>

I spoke to Taisie and Vivian almost every day, telling me about all the things they did over the summer, all the magical sights they saw and I found myself wishing that I was back at Hogwarts rather than here, in muggle London with my vicious sister and busy parents.

One curious letter, unexpected, opened an entirely new can of worms though, and brought about my close friendship with one Remus Lupin. And I discovered that he was obviously the brains behind all the Marauder's covert operations, a point that I tried to overlook considering that I genuinely liked him. He was a really nice guy when James and Sirius weren't hogging the spot light. He was very easy going and extraordinarily mature, which made me find him much easier to relate with.

I had to literally drag my mother from the house as she kept scrambling back saying we'd forgotten something. I think, secretly she didn't want me to leave; that she'd missed seeing me every day and if I hadn't loved Hogwarts so much I think I would have stayed. No James Potter to deal with. My mind flashed instantly to the kiss last year and I wondered if we would be back to normal this year. That he'd laid enough girls over the summer to infuriate me and return everything to equilibrium. Though I desperately wanted to yell at him for sex at his age, I always stepped carefully around that subject knowing he would just call me a prude and then ask me to have sex with him.

Half of the time, he just decided to skip the whole 'ask on a date' part and go straight to the 'ask for some sex' part. I remember the one and only time I'd told him what I thought. He'd looked thrilled to finally argue with me about it, but I made sure that there was no one around when I decided to broach it. It was probably going to get pretty ugly.

"You jealous?" He asked, his eyes twinkling against his so-called drop dead gorgeous features that the girls of Hogwarts fawned over.

"More like disgusted. How many STD's do you have?" I scoffed.

"I don't sleep with prostitutes. No diseases, I've got the charms to get the 'elite, righteous' girls without any freaky sickness to drop their panties with only a few words."

"You're a pervert."

"You're a prude." He shrugged, running his fingers through his hair, then smirking when he noticed me glaring at it.

"You know you want me." He said arrogantly.

"Yeah, I want you... OUT OF MY LIFE!"

"Aww, I make your life more interesting. Admit it."

"You are exhausting, Potter. I don't know how you live with your self."

"Exhausted?" He asked, smirking jauntily. "Late night?" asked Potter suggestively. "As fun as this is... I'm supposed to be meeting with a lady-friend, so I'll have to talk to you later." He winked before turning around a corner, leaving me irritated and, yes, exhausted, though not from what he was implying.

I glanced back at the house as we pulled away, it would be a while before I saw them again, but I would be able to communicate with the school owls. I boarded the train and the ride was smooth sailing, no scenes as there had been every year since first on every train ride, thankfully.

But as the train arrived in Hogsmeade, it became clear that there were no changes in the awkwardness between Potter and me.

"Well, you look good." He said to me when he was sure we were out of earshot. I sighed. He was so hot and cold. Nice, then slutty. Sensitive then arrogant. Let's say it together now, Mixed Signals.

"Thanks." I said, aimlessly.

"So this is it. We're just going to be awkward forever. I won't even be able to enjoy fighting with you any more." He pouted.

"Are you serious? You selfish prick." I told him. "You are impossible." How many times had I told him that? Too many to count. Maybe when I got to three or four hundred he would take a hint and maybe quit trying to be impossibly irritating for his entire life. I was at awe that he had any friends at all. Of course, most his friends are just as shallow as he is.

"S'not my fault you're so uptight." He defended.

I scoffed. "I am not uptight."

"Oh really. Then do something impulsive. Whatever comes to mind." I stood there staring at him. The crowd from the train far ahead. The only thing that came to mind was the kiss, and if I wanted to ruin our enemy-ship then by all means. I tried to read his face but I couldn't tell if he was thinking about it. I couldn't tell what he expected me to do.

"See. Uptight." He turned back and started walking. He looked dissappointed for some reason. Then I realized that that was not what he was excpecting me to do. He had expected somthing.

"No." I grabbed his elbow and spun him around to slap him across the face. He clutched at his cheek with his right hand.

"That wasn't imp-" Then I reached up and grabbed his neck, cutting him off and tangling my fingers in the hair at the base of his neck, yanking his lips down to mine.

He was a drug. I couldn't get enough and I couldn't give him up no matter how hard I fought or how bad it was for me. The attraction was overwhelming, like nothing I'd ever seen or felt before. Everything bad or stressful faded when I got close enough to him. The relief was addictive. I forced myself to get closer and closer, trying to mesh two bodies into one, for the satisfaction. I was a selfish girl. No matter how much it pained him or me, I just kept doing it. But once I was out of reach, temporarily relieved of the relief and reality set in again. I made myself leave him. The animosity between up was protecting us, protecting both of us. From ourselves.

I gripped his hair, tugging passionately while he sucked on my bottom lip. His hands ran up and down the sides of my body, hormone driven. My brain was too fried to try and stop him. He lifted me up by the back of my thighs and blocked me against a stone wall.

He pulled away and stared me in the eyes.

"I think we've missed the last carriages." I giggled averting my eyes. Whoa. I giggle? That stopped me dead. James Potter was my arch nemesis.

I stretched the distance to his chest, pushing my palm against him. He looked down at me. I hate that he looks down on me. Oh, but his hair makes up for it completely.

"NO." I said, shocking even myself.

"What?" He looked concerned.

"I'm not getting into this relationship. I don't want to be involved with you. I don't want a public anything." He looked confused. "How do you not see the problem? We have been enemies for about four years, can you imagine the drama that would be surrounding it. And the fact that we can't stand each other."

He shook his head, "Come on. Who says we have to be public? We can just keep this between you and me. Everyone is happy." He murmured, his breath washing over her face.

"No. No. I don't-"

"Lighten up, Evans." Potter said, his lips moving to her throat and her thoughts began to scatter.

"I-I," She stumbled unable to grasp her words. "Gah." She said as his tongue flicked across her skin.

"I think that was a 'yes'." He smirked against her.

"You do realize the other problems that will come with this. The sneaking around. We're going to have to continue to fight." Lily said, dubious as he drew his lips away.

"I don't think it will be that hard. No one would ever suspect, hence they won't be looking for the signs. The question is can you keep up with this 'no strings attatched' theory. You're a girl, all gooey feelings and rubbish." Considering the type of girls he normally hung around it's not surprising he has this assement of girls. They were all squeally and emothional . They can't keep things basic. And they always want there to be a relationship.

"It's the most logical thing to do. Besides we're only attracted to each other physically, right? So no problem." I reasoned. For a moment I saw his eyes flicker with excitement, same as what I felt.

"You are going to be careful too. I don't want any of the freaky sexually transmitted diseases you can pick up. I don't have any and I don't want any of the bloody diseases some of the girls you sleep with have. Got it!" He smirked.

"We'll have to see how you are before I decide." I raised an eyebrow.

"Don't expect me to sleep with you. You should have to common sense to know that you can get some diseases without shagging." He gave me a condescending self-important look. I glared at him.

"You will not tell you're friends. Exceptions are the reason these things fall apart." I glared at him. Did he think I was going to follow his orders like some servant of his? It was incredible how condescending he came of sounding. It was off the charts.

"You are not the boss of me! The theory of secret is that no one knows. Maybe we need to reassess if you feel the need to voice things you should already know."

"I was merely making sure you know. Don't expect me to change anything about myself because you want me to. If you start getting clingy or emotional, I'll call it off."

"And vice versa." I smirked at him. Instead of the irritation I suspected he looked at me curiuosly. The look he gets when we're in class and he's thinking really hard about something. Concentrating. I wonder what about that comment triggered that response.

Did he know something I didn't?

"You are not the same girl you were, Lily Evans. You are not the innocent third-year that you were last year." His deep eyes were honest and wise. There was no trace of arrogance or condescension. He reminded me for a split second of the night we first kissed, how he'd looked so sweet and concerned. He looked like a friend.

"Times change, Potter." I told him sadly. "Times change..." I turned and started the long walk towards the castle

The castle was lit up and beautiful against the night sky. The stars twinkling and reflecting off the Black Lake. A carriage surprised us with Professor Binns.

"Where have you been? Go, up and in. Now!" Potter rolled his eyes and laughed. I grimaced at his disrespect, but Binns didn't seem to notice.

I climbed into the carriage ahead of Potter, who I'm sure was all too thrilled with the butt-shot.

When Binns didn't join us I asked politely, "Aren't you coming, sir?"

"No. You aren't the only stragglers." He droned monotonously, before the carriage suddenly started moving forward.

"Thank god." Potter muttered. I shot him a look, as I would have had under any circumstances.

"You are so rude. Show some respect. They are you're elders." He grinned at the argument, prepared to antagonize me. I wished I hadn't said anything. But this made me confident. We could do this and still appear the same to everyone else.

We continued this argument all the way to the castle gates, where my friends were waiting for me.

"Thank god. We were worried one of you had finally killed the other." Vivian said.

"No." Quite the opposite in fact.

"Oh, James, " Vivian said and I sensed the flirting tone in her voice. Had I been missing it all this time? "Sirius said that they were headed up to the Feast and that if James's pestering hadn't gotten to you by now, that your failure would not be welcomed at their table. I think he was joking, but all the same." Now that I was listening for it, I heard the tense undertone of her statement very obviously.

"I do believe I will be unwelcome." His voice lowered, "Perhaps, you have a seat for me?" Potter leaned towards Vivian, who giggled hysterically. To my surprise and delight, I wasn't at all bothered by this.

"After you, ladies." Potter said, ushering Taisie and Vivian forward with a hand on Vivian's back. In a nearly inaudible voice he looked back at me, "Keep it secret? No problem. See."

I frowned at him. He was playing my best friend so that our relations wouldn't be so obvious. Vivian could be a ditz sometimes and I knew she was ignoring the fact that Potter was a well-known player.

A little voice in my head asked me_, how is it any different from what your doing? _

_I'm not tricking myself into having or interpreting feelings from Potter. Vivian is._

* * *

><p>"Vivian. How can you like him? You know how he is with girls!" Taisie chastised as the main dishes were swept from the table.<p>

"I'd be different. We'd love each other." She said firmly.

"Vi, you know that's not true!" I jumped in. I bit my lip annoyed with myself. I was physically with James Potter and here I was trying to discourage Vivian from doing exactly that.

"I'm sorry. Not everyone can be as angelic and bloody perfect as you are. You have to accept their faults not jump down their throats because you think you're so much better than them. Well, Miss Top-Of-The-Class, news flash, not everyone is as virginal and virtuous as you are. Just deal with it. I like a guy. You hate a guy. You seem to be the only one! Maybe he's not the screwed up one, you are!" I recoiled, stung.

"If that's how you feel," I said quietly.

"Yeah, that's how I feel!" She hissed. I nodded.

"Goodnight, Taisie. Vivian." I gathered my bag and walked out of the Great Hall headed to the Gryffindor tower, stopping only to ask a prefect for the password.

"Lily!" A voice called. I turned around to see Aaron, running towards me. His black hair spiked up with gel in a new look that suited him well.

I smiled brightly, pushing the fight with Vivian from the center of my thoughts for a moment. "Hey."

"Hi. How was your summer?" He asked politely.

"Fine. Nothing special." He nodded.

"Okay. I, uh, don't really know how to say this. I've never really beat around the bush much. Uh, what are you doing this coming Hogsmeade weekend?"

I hesitated a bit unsure where he was going. "I've got no plans. Why?" He shuffled his feet a bit.

"Would you like to maybe, uh, go with me?" He was immensely interested in his shoes for the entire conversation.

"Aaron, I, uh. Are you asking me out?" He nodded without looking up. "I'd, uh, I'd like that. When is it?"

"Two weeks."

"Thanks. For asking me. I'll look forward to it." I said kindly. He looked up and grinned. He muttered some goodbyes and ran back towards the Great Hall. I stopped short for a minute. Was this going to anger Vivian? The last thing I needed was another reason for her to be angry with me. I heard noise and looked up, stopping my mind's internal arguement.

A few steps ahead of me a figure emerged from a hall way, chucking deeply.

"Virgins." Potter stepped into the light. "You both sounded like virgins. You ever been asked out before?" His voice was excedingly arrogant now. I blushed. This was one area where I couldn't claim expertise.

"What do you want?" I said.

"You're blushing!" He laughed, humiliating me. "That's the vivacious Lily Evans I know... I want to know if our arrangement is still on."

"Of course not. I'm not a cheater."

"Whoa. So you think that makes you in a relationship?" His smirk twitched. I didn't know an answer he couldn't ridicule.

I glared at him. "You're an ass, Potter."

"So you tell me every day, but I've asked girls out before, with mass amounts more grace, and I've never been in an actual relationship. But by those standards..." He trailed off. "Virgins." He scoffed.

"Have you ever tried being nice to someone? Not being an conceited prick?" I fumed. "Just because your daddy owns half the world, doesn't give you elevated rights. No one deserves the way you treat people."

"I'm not feeling in the mood for a 'you arrogant prat' converstation tonight. But if you want a quick shag you know where to find me. If not, good night, Evans. I'm going to go find some other girl to shag tonight." He turned away before looking back over his shoulder a moment. "Oh, and it does give me elevated right, babe." He turned back and stuffed his hands in his pockets, whistling while he strolled back to the Great Hall.

I stood stunned for a moment. Absorbing. Five minutes and I've gotten a boyfriend (maybe), lost a boytoy, and gotten into a fight with a best friend. I'm a busy girl. I slowly walk up to the Gryffindor Common room and settle down.

I unpack my cat and train bag and dressed in my night clothes. I pulled out my potions book and looked over a few of the first potions, before finding myself unable to focus.

I turned off all the lights and laid staring through the window, thinking everything over.

This summer, Tuney had gotten engaged to a rude lump of a man. My parents were thrilled and are spending every spare minute planning. Vernon and Petunia have been spending a lot of time at home and stare down their noses at me every chance they get. As a result, I spent a lot of time out of the house, with my muggle friends, Christina and Honey.

They were supportive but Lily began realizing that she and her sister, who'd prior been very close, may never repair their relationship. The thought had depressed her for all summer and was only growing as the wedding approached. It certainly didn't help when Christina and Honey confessed their their father's work was moving them to New York City. IN THE UNITED STATES. A completely different continent!

I blotted the thoughts from my head and stared through the window, feigning sleep when Taisie and most of the dorm came in. Oddly enough, I didn't hear Vivian speak nor did I see her get into bed. She's probably just talking to Aaron.

Sometime later, several hours, I heard Vivian come in but I fell asleep almost immediately after, distressed thoughts seeping into my dreams.

I woke early the next morning, slipping down to breakfast when it's deserted in an attempt to avoid Vivian.

Sitting down at the usual end of the Gryffindor table, I fill my plate up with eggs and toast. Soon after another body joined me.

James Potter was staring at me with his usual self-righteous sarcastic smirk on his face. "What?" I asked annoyed.

"Are you sure you don't-"

"Go to hell, Potter."

"Good. An argument, what a great way to start the day." I rolled my eyes.

"You arrogant prick, I don't argue with you because I want to. I argue with you because you're an _arrogant prick_." He smiled.

"Sexual tension."

"I'm done eating." I said, roughly pushing the plate away and standing up. "Perfect timing." I murmured as Vivian and Taisie came into the hall. Giving them plenty of space, I left with my book bag for Transfig leaving me more than enough time to review what we were going to be reviewing today.

"Okay, class. For half of this year, I've planned a project. You will each have a partner and you will be observing for almost everyday before continuing with your observations. I've assembled a model of animagus transformations that you will be studying. I'll hand out information packets once you've been assigned to your partner." I glanced across the room at Remus, who did the same. Whenever we had the choice, we found it easier to just work together than pick one of our friends, who argued over us each and every time.

"No. You will not be picking your partners!" She said frustrated as her students began to speak quietly with different people across the room. "And once they've been assigned you will not change them.

With a flick of her wand, two slips of paper dug their way out of the bowl that had been set next to her.

"Marcus and V. Mason." Vivian and Taisie smiled, pleased.

"Black and Lupin."

"WOOOT!" Black shouted, clapping a miserable looking Remus on the shoulder.

"Potter and Evans." Our eyes widened. Then McGonagall looked up. "Oh, no. That's an inevitable disaster. That won't do-"

"I don't mind, Professor. I am perfectly capable of working civily with Evans. If she can't perform-"

"Are you implying that I won't be able to do well because _you_ are my partner?"

"Yes. I am. You're known for getting a little _crazy_ when you speak with me." He said smirking, taunting her.

"Professor, I do hope that you know that I can do well on this project with any partner, even if his name is James Potter. You don't need to reassign us, _I'll_ be able to keep my personal problem out of it."

"I don't think-"

"Don't worry, Minnie." James said. "I think Evans and I'll have fun." He winked at me and I rolled my eyes.

Professor McGonagall's eyes shot up. "Yes, well, I'll believe that when I see it. You are positive that you can work together without a problem?"

We both nodded firmly. "Well, okay. Everybody will be sitting next to their partners, begin rearranging yourselves."

"A. Mason and Darwent." Samantha and Aaron settled themselves in across the room and I smiled at him. Tentatively he smiled back. Professor McGonagall sorted the rest of us into pairs, keeping the Slytherins with each other and the Gryffindors with each other to prevent too many problems.

I pulled out parchment and a quill to begin taking notes as she explained the project.

I glanced at James from the corner of my eye. He was winking at another girl across the room, I frowned when I saw who it was. Vivian blushed furiously and looked down a small smile on her face.

"What did you do?" I hissed at James.

"I don't have to tell you."

"When it involves my friends you do."

"I don't have to tell you about my sex life no matter who it includes." My eyes widened with horror. He was implying that he and Vivian had sex. I was frozen for more than a minute, uncomprehending and doubtful. Vivian was smarter than that. I snapped out of it and began defending her.

"No! She wouldn't, she-" I gasped, struggling for words.

"Was pretty good." James said with a smirk, always smooth.

"With you?" I asked aghast. He gave me a condescending look.

"Duh." Though I knew he was a good liar, something about the way Vivian had blushed made me wonder if maybe he was being honest.

"No, no, no. Oh, my god. I can't believe you. You self centered, asshole. I can't believe you seduced her!"

"You really can't believe it? I'm gorgeous and very popular with the ladies. Have you not hated me since first year for doing this kind of thing?" He laughed deeply, and I became infuriated. He was casting her feelings aside with no regrets and laugh. He really was a cold and heartless as I'd always known.

"But Vivian was waiting-" I stuttered more defense though my heart was no longer really in it.

"Apparently not." He smirked, tipping his chair back.

"You bastard. You insensitive bastard." I hissed becoming very angry.

"Hey, she knew full well what she was getting into. She should know that I don't call girls the next day."

"Are you kidding me? That's your excuse. She's like in love with you, she wasn't thinking about that!"

"I have no regrets." He said casually, leaning back in his chair. My hand whipped out before I could stop it and the crack echoed around the class room as it connected with his face. Almost everyone turned to us, McGonagall emerging from her office, where she'd temporarily been to retrieve papers fortunately.

"Bitch." He spat loudly. "What the hell?" His fingertips brushed his cheek, where a stinging red mark was appearing in the shape of my small hand. He glared at me irritated.

'You." I said angerly. "Excuse me, professor, may I be excused for a minute." She shook her head but said yes, obviously doubting her earlier decision to let us work together and I stalked from the classroom furiously.

Vivian wouldn't sleep with Potter. She liked him but she was practical enough not to. But sometimes I underestimated Potter, he could be very sly. My mind battled with what I knew and what I was denying I knew. Subconsiously, I think that I knew that Vivian had, but more because Potter had coerced her into doing it for his own pleasure.

I leaned against the wall outside and heard Taisie come outside of the class room as well.

"Are you okay?" She asked standing a little away from me.

"You have to answer me honestly when i ask you this, okay?" I stared deeply into her eyes, trying to penetrate into her soul. If I stared at her hard enough Taisie usually told you what you wanted to know.

"Maybe." She shrugged her shoulders, focusing intensly on me.

"Did Vivian have sex with James Potter last night?" Taisie watched me carefully as she answered, monitoring my reaction. She looked slightly surprised as I asked.

"I think so, yes. Who told you?" Darkening eyes, I glared at a nonexistent point behind Taisie that was shifting to appear to be James Potter.

"James Potter, who was definitely not the person I wanted to hear it from." I hissed. Taisie sighed in agreement. He would twist things and be an ass and only make me angrier, though I believe that when he told me something of that nature, his only intention was to irriate me. Though I did wonder why he didn't find it counterproductive considering that every other day he asks me out or asks me to have sex with him, which is just humiliating and annoying. You'd think that if he really wanted to have sex with me he'd quit acting like an ass. I thrust that from my mind. This wasn't about me, this was about Vivian.

"You need to make up with Vivian, she's going to eventually realize that he's not going to 'call her back' and you need to be a friend for her. So buck up and apologize before you tell her that you know." I nodded my agreement.

"Today during study hall, I'll talk to her.' I said confidently. This was going to go well. She would forgive me and hopefully she would tell me before I brought forth the 'I already knew' card. Taisie smiled.

"I'll be able to sleep better once you two work all of your problems out... But then there's the whole Potter thing. And more sleepless nights of worrying are to come."

"Come on. We need to get back or Vivian will get suspicious."

The rest of class was interesting and infuriating. Potter was sitting next to me, watching me and Vivian and smirking occasionally, while I took notes on what the teacher was saying. I stopped myself scarely each time I felt the urge to kick him. A physical disagreement was not one I would win.

* * *

><p>My morning classes fast and I was at lunch before I even knew it, picking up my bags and beginning to walk to study hall. I encountered Vivian along the way in a more secluded part of the route.<p>

'Hey, Viv?" She turned around her eyes calm but angry. Her robes were slightly askew and her make up was roughly done.

"What?" Her voice was angry and regretful though I couldn't tell which emotion she was directing at me. She sounded far away and I didn't blame her.

"I wanted to say... I'm sorry for being so judgemental and hurtful to your feelings. Next time I like a boy, you can ridicule me as well. I'm sorry about everything I said and I'm acknowledging everything you said. And I hope that we don't let a boy ruin our friendship." I stepped closer to her with pleading eyes. "Do you think you could forgive me if I promise to work on it?" I hugged her tightly until she finally relaxed. She was emotionally vulnerable, which made forgiveness so much easier. I'd never solved a fight with a best friend this quickly. They generally lasted a few weeks before we could resolve our problems, which were often serious disagreements.

"Thank you." I murmured in her ear. "I hate arguing with you." I pulled back and found Vivian choking back sobs.

"Honey.." I said softly.

"He's not going to call me back is he?" She said assuming that I knew. I rubbed her arm and slowly shook my head.

"No. I don't think he will." She sobbed harder, tears streaming down her face, her eyes bloodshot and heavy.

"Come 'ere. Let's get you out of the spotlight." I pulled her of to the side to an even more secluded hall way. She was about to fall apart, I could see it and she didn't need an audience when she did. She stumbled onto a bench, her feet giving way and her head drooping. I sat next to her with one arm around her back. Her sobs quieted as she told me what happened.

"I-I didn't mean to." She cried. "But- b- He was saying- a- all these things- and I was mad- mad at you. A-and then he- he was everywhere and- and it felt so-so good and I didn'- want him to - to think I was - a - a prude who wouldn't - wouldn't put out. And then he just kinda -left - left me there and I thought -he was just sc-scared of a real-tionship, but he just want- wanted sex." She choked out, crying even harder as she spilled her account to me. "I'm a slut." She cried.

'No, you're not. He's just good at making girls think things they don't really feel. He took advantage of you, this isn't your fault."

"This is when you're supposed to say, 'I told you so', Lily." She laughed bitterly. "You were right. He would never like me." I shook my head roughly. Every other girl who'd gotten torn apart by James Potter when through this. They all realized that he only wanted one thing and they'd tricked themselves into thinking that he wanted more. And he thrived on these girls, telling them what they wanted to hear, getting what he wanted, and then running out the door with their hopes as soon as he was done.

He was selfish and none of these girls saw that. I could only hope that for every girls sake one day in the future James Potter would meet his match and she would straighten him out and kick him off his high-horse. Until then.. we were all doomed.

Little did I suspect, I might just be that girl. That girl with that mighty purpose.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, how did you like it? I wasn't sure if I should add Vivian in now or later, but I settled on now. Let me know what you think. Any corrections? Any ideas?<strong>

**-Scarlet4562**


	9. A Kiss in the First Snow

**I have some free time, but I don't know when I'll next be able to update again so I make no promises, but this is the next chapter. Hope you like it!**

* * *

><p>Lily took her seat in Herbology towards the end of the day, James Potter's gaze piercing her constantly as she tried to work. What was wrong with that boy? Her anger was overwhelming as James Potter's daily habits came to affect those closest to her. He didn't seem at all perturbed by the emotional tidal wave he'd set upon Vivian.<p>

Lily met his gaze as she slipped from the classroom, holding his gaze with a cold angered glare as long as she could before the door blocked their connection. His eyes were as untroubled as they'd been two days before - his life unchanged by the event that Vivian would never forget. The event that would likely haunt Vivian for months to come. This was not the first time she had seen James Potter wreak havoc on a naive girl.

* * *

><p>"I was wondering if you could help-" Aaron started as he walked next to her as they headed towards Herbology, her next class after Transfigurations.<p>

"Lily!" Taisie cried, chasing after them. "Oh, hey Aaron. Lily, I think we should make sure Vivian's okay before Herbology."

"Definately." Lily agreed as they changed directions to head to the dormitories, which were only slightly out of the way of their path to Herbology.

"Vee?" Aaron asked, worried for his twin. "Is she okay?"

"She was just feeling under the weather, thought we'd go see her." Lily said, careful not to mention anything about what Potter had done, but not outright lying to Aaron either. For a moment, her anger at Potter renewed with a passion, same as each time she remembered what he'd done.

"Should I?" He asked them, knowing that Vivian usually liked to keep her space from Aaron at school.

"No. I think she'll be fine." Taisie said before waving Aaron's concerns off and leaving him to walk to Herbology alone.

"Do you really? You think she'll be fine?" Lily asked Taisie doubtfully.

"I think that... when she realizes that she's learned a valuable lesson, that she will then be able to get better. Until then, we'll just tough it out." Taisie said.

* * *

><p>One and a half weeks later found Lily sitting next to Potter in Transfigurations, with her shoulder facing against him and bent over her paper. She cursed as her quill's tip snapped off. Digging around in her bag yielded no other quills and reminded her of the order sitting on her nightstand that she'd intended to ship today.<p>

"Damn." She muttered, lost without a quill.

'Here." A seductive voice said, a bloodred quill with an expensive tip was extended into her line of vision. She sneared at it and the hand from which it was offered. Her eyes followed up the arm to the face it belonged to.

"I don't need anything from you, Potter." She spat with irriatation.

"Are you really going to look a free lunch in the mouth? Are you really in a position to do that?" He asked, his offer laced with condescencion and insult, offended by her rude dismissal of his offer.

Lily continued to stare down the quill and its owner, determined not to be in debt to the boy before her. "For Merlin's sake, Evans, just take the damned quill. You can return it to me later and we'll never speak of this again."

Begrudgingly, Lily slowly wrapped her fingers around the quill, her desperation to take the lesson down outweighing her despire to spite James Potter. She pulled the quill from his grasp and quickly turned away. Potter chuckled at her obvious attempt to hide the exchange and contented himself with smirking at her for several more minutes - knowing very well that he was irritating her.

"Damn you, Potter." Lily hissed as McGonagall concluded her lesson. Frantically scribbling down the last of her notes, Lily couldn't help but notice the ease at which the quality expensive silver tipped quill moved across the paper and it made her feel selfconsious. She wasn't rich. She lived in a substandard, lower middle class home with few resources and parents with typical struggling jobs.

For a moment, she found herself jealous of Potter and his life. Before the thought could truly register, she choked a laugh and shoved it to the back of her mind. Nobody's family was perfect; the Potter's included.

McGonagall dismissed them, with a flick of her wrist, sending the fourth years on a mad dash to the door.

"Just keep it." Potter murmured as he brushed past her and caught up to Black before she could object. Lily sighed and thrust the quill into her bag for her next class.

Vivian walked next to Lily and Taisie towards Herbology. She was almost back to her old self, pre-Potter. She didn't mention it anymore and she seemed to be fine, but to Lily and Taisie's dismay, they could see that she was not over James Potter despite what he'd done to her.

Worried they'd upset her emotional processes, they decided not to broach the topic. While she wasn't over her crush - she wasn't going to make the same mistake twice. Lily hoped.

Potter left the Great Hall after dinner early that night, which wasn't odd as none of the rest of the Marauder's had even shown up and Lily had scowled at him the entire dinner as he flirted with the multitude of girls that surrounded him. Arrogant, self absorbed cockroach.

Feeling the quill in her bag, Lily excused herself and chased after James Potter.

"Potter! Potter!" She called after him. He stopped and turned around, casually releasing and catching the Golden Snitch that struggled to escape his grasp.

"Ho, Evans." He said. "What can I do for a pretty little thing like yourself?" He gazed at her with 'The Smoulder' that knocked the breath out of every girl he met. It had the same affect on Lily, not that she would ever let Potter know that.

"Shove off Potter. I'm not one of your dimwitted blondes you can wrap around your pinkie finger." She growled.

"No, you're not... I like the red much better." He said, extending his finger to twirl a piece of her hair, that had fallen from her taut bun. Sidestepping, Lily gave him a warning look filled with aggravation and annoyance.

"Your quill." Lily said digging his quill from her bag. "I, uh, I don't need it anymore." She held it out to him, her thanks more of the unspoken kind.

"You owe me one." James teased. Lily glared at him firmly.

"I don't _owe_ you anything." She hissed venomously. His gaze averted for a moment, flickering.

"Look, Evans... about what happened. I'm, uh... I'm - I'm sorry." He said with smoldering hazel eyes. Lily shook her head to clear the clouding his dazzling look had envoked.

"No you're not. Hell, do you even know what sorry means, Potter?" She scoffed at him. "You don't know what it means to be sorry. Don't say you're sorry if you don't mean it." His eyes turned icy as his gaze penetrated her angrily. Being called out by Lily of all people only angered him more.

"You're overstepping your bounds, Evans." He growled menacingly, leaning his dark eyes close to her. "Watch your step." Lily's angry stare rivaled Potter's as they maintained eye contact.

"Next friday night, five sharp. Meet me at the library to do the project. Do not be late." He said before turning on his heel and striding away from her, his anger still radiating in his wake. He didn't fight fair. She would never best James Potter as long as he always invoked his power over almost the entire world. One word to the school board and he could have her expelled the next day. Her education mattered enough for her to hold her tongue when her heart was screaming at her to slap him across the face and tell him right from wrong.

Lily continued on to her dormitory, where for once there was some peace and quiet. She finished a trifling potions essay and the required amount of time to work on Transfiguration before settling into bed shortly after her roommates returned from dinner.

The next morning at breakfast a letter arrived for Lily in response to the letter she'd sent her parents a few weeks earlier. Lily's hand shook as she pulled it from the owl's leg, her fingers crossed. She barely skimmed the first line before she folded it up and tucked it in her shirt to read later in a more private setting, where she wouldn't have to hide the pain and the anger she felt at her parents.

The rest of the week whizzed by incredibly fast, Vivian no longer speaking of Potter and us not prying for her to talk about it. For irrational reasons, Saturday morning left Lily standing in front of her closet door contemplating what to wear - which she never did.

Lily glanced at herself in the mirror, she had woken up early – and Lily wasn't an early riser – to pick out what she was to wear to Hogsmeade with Aaron. The weather was getting colder and the first snow would be any day.

Today it was raining, leaving few options for weatherproof outfits. With an irritated sigh, Lily pulled on a pair of worn jeans relishing the denim that usually never graced her legs until summer break. She pulled on her favorite red long sleeve button up shirt with the cinched waist.

She cringed. The fancy shirt had been purchased at Salvation Army with her mother a summer ago when they'd been invited to a dinner party, and it was simply not the same speed as the old jeans that she'd worn too many times to be used for anything but scrap fabric.

"Oh, god. You're not going to _wear_ that are you?" Taisie asked aghast. "Lily, what would you do without me?"

Lily smiled in appreciation as Taisie began to pull clothes from the closet the girls shared.

She tossed Lily a pair of jeans, "These were supposed to be for your birthday." They were dark black skinny jeans. A plain cotton red shirt landed on Lily's head as she pulled the jeans on. "Here," Taisie said finally with a green overcoat from Vivian's clothes hanging over her arm. "It'll be long but that's okay… And wear those flats you've got."

"Lily! Merlin! Would you put your hair down?" Taisie sighed.

"No, I like it better up. It too… dangerous down." Taisie groaned. She'd seen Lily with her hair down _only_ if you caught her immediately out of the shower, otherwise Lily refused to let the soft and beautiful auburn curls down from the tense bun she kept them in. The only leeway Taisie and Vivian had been able to make was on very rare occasions, Lily would leave her hair in a ponytail or a braid instead of a bun.

"Whatever. Come on. You've only got ten minutes." Taisie reminded her as Lily ran to the bathroom to brush her teeth.

"Can't keep my brother waiting." Vivian said from the doorway, in jeans and a sweater, a smile on her face and a pastry in her hand. "You look great by the way." She said with a smile.

"Thanks." Lily said, blushing as she smoothed out the coat. "What are you two going to do?" She asked.

"We're going Honeyduke's and the Three Broomsticks later and then we're probably going to head back to the castle. We've still got homework due Monday.'

"Don't have too much fun without me." Lily teased them as she tied the belt of the coat around her waist.

"We wouldn't dream of it. Now go." Vivian laughed, ushering Lily out the door with a slap on the arse.

Lily threw one last look at her two friends before she closed the door behind her and bounced out of the common room and down the staircases of Hogwarts. Aaron was waiting for her at one of the benches in the main entrance to Hogwarts, jumping to his feet when he saw her.

"You look really nice." He said and Lily blushed again, staring at her shoes and tugging on her sleeves.

"You do too." She said observing his dark grey sweater that really brought out his eyes. He offered his hand to her and they stepped out of the doors onto the wet ground, and the sprinkling rain that was coming down lightly.

The ground was damp under their feet and Lily tiptoed on the balls of her feet through the mud.

"Great weather." Aaron remarked with little enthusiasm, obviously at a loss of what to say.

"If you like rain." Lily replied with a smile. "I like rain. Mud however, is another subject entirely." She gripped Aaron's hand tighter as she hopped over a large puddle of water. "Will there still be a quidditch game tomorrow in this?"

"They wouldn't cancel the game if there was a tornado in the middle of the pitch. The messier, the better." Aaron said with a grin.

"You play?" Lily asked.

"Yeah. I'm keeper. You don't go to many of the games do you?" Lily shook her head.

"I've never found it particularly interesting."

"What!" Aaron exclaimed. "You've got to be kidding me. Come to the game tomorrow. I promise you won't regret it." Said Aaron.

"I don't see anything that would be stopping me. Okay, I'll go. Are you playing?"

"No. It's Slytherin and Hufflepuff. Everyone already knows that Slytherin's going to win but they're all still rooting for Hufflepuff."

"Sports dynamics. I don't think I'll ever understand that."

"You can't until you've played. But the game to watch this year is next month, Slytherin vs. Gryffindor. Always the most competitive. You remember when Lance Dullen ended up in the Hospital Wing last year?"

"That was over Quidditch?" Lily exclaimed, "That's awful!" Aaron laughed.

"Boys will be boys." He told her. Lily scoffed at this understatement.

'No. Potter will be Potter." Aaron snorted in agreement.

"Was Potter the one behind that?" He asked as Lily rolled her eyes in joking irritation.

"Is that even a question? When in doubt, blame Potter and Black."

"Hey now. That's not fair." A deeply amused voice said behind her. Potter and Black had added themselves to the party, walking on either side of the couple.

"You don't know if it was our fault." Potter said in all seriousness. Black snorted.

"Honestly, mate? What are the chances it wasn't?"

"Slim." Potter agreed, "But we should be given the chance to defend ourselves, should we not? Besides, I do believe Moony was to blame for Lance Dullen."

"Remus?" Lily asked skeptically. "Remus set Lance Dullen's hair on fire? _And _turn his skin that putrid shade of yellow? Now why don't I believe that."

"Well, inadvertantly and.. indirectly, yes." Black said straight faced. "He gave us the idea."

"Did he now?" Lily said with arched eyebrows.

'Oh, lighten up, Evans." Potter said, making a face at her.

"Sod off, Potter." Lily growled. "You too, Black."

"That would be our cue to leave." Black said with a smirk, pulling Potter ahead of them. Potter's piercing gaze stayed with Lily a moment before he gave Aaron a threatening glare, glanced back at Lily and then turned and chased Black down the hill.

Lily shook her head, trying to rid her mind of Potter's icy gaze.

"Whew." Aaron said relief etched across his face. "I thought Potter was going to come at me right there."

"What? Why would he do that?" Lily asked confused. Aaron gave her a peculiar glance.

"Nothing. Don't know why I said that." He muttered as they reached Honeydukes. The warm sugary smelling air radiated from the doorway and Lily grinned as she entered, her stomach growling.

"It smells so... fattening in here." She said with a delighted giggle. "Mmmm." She said as she took a wiff of the bakery near the front of Honeydukes. "Look at that toffee."

"Someone has a sweet tooth." Aaron teased her as they finally stepped out of Honeydukes with a bag filled with chocolate and candy. Lily blushed.

'It's all just so good." She murmured, holding her candy close to her chest as the cold wind and rain hit them. "Zonko's? Oh, no, nevermind." She said as she watched Potter and his friends disappear behind the door of Zonko's. "You don't mind if we stop by Scrivenshaft's, do you? I need a new quill."

"Not at all, let's go. Then do you want to go to the Three Broomsticks to warm up?"

"That sounds nice." Lily smiled at him as they entered Scrivenshaft's. "I'll only be a moment." Lily walked quickly down the aisles, finding her quill that had been meticulously picked out on her last trip and purchased it for the lowest possible price, stuffing it gently into her pocket with her few remaining Knuts and Sickles. She set her bags on the bench outside as she rearranged her outfit, smoothing her coat and hair before picking all her things up again and heading to the Three Broomsticks.

When they finally managed to find a quiet table for two at the back of the Three Broomsticks, they ordered two Butterbeers and took off their gloves, their cheeks glowing red, speaking in soft voices. Lily tucked her fists under her neck trying to regain feels, giggling as Aaron shook the rain out of his hair - splattering her with wet droplets of water.

She gasped suddenly feeling her bare wrist on her throat, "Shoot, I left my bracelet on the bench outside. I'll be right back." She squeezed his hand before hopping out of her chair.

'Do you want me to come?" Aaron asked.

"No, it'll only take a minute." She stood and jogged outside, shivering as she glanced around in the rain for the bracelet. "Come on." She groaned as the rain pelted her face.

"Looking for this?" James asked, dangling her bracelet beside her, his hand on her waist suddenly. James Potter had a bad habit of bringing out the worst in Lily as she stamped her foot, cursing.

"Dammit, Potter! I am on a _date_. Give it back now!" She cursed turning to face him and found herself backed against a freezing stone wall, James Potter's warm breath on her face, making her thoughts hazy.

"Make me." He murmured, leaning in, rain dripping off of his long eyelashes onto her pale face. His lips met hers, tipping her head back. Lily sighed briefly as his presence washed all of her stress away – her face relaxing for a split second. Then she shoved him away with all the strength in her body, glaring at him in disgust, snatching the bracelet from his hand.

She opened her mouth to shout at him when she saw the small white flakes begin to fall from the sky. Snow. It was snowing – the first snow of the year. She watched a small flake float through the air, until it settled on Potter's eyelashes, melting quickly. A bubbly laugh coursed through her as she leaned back letting the snow fall on her face and neck, closing her eyes and embracing the perfect moment. The reality-less aftermath of Potter's lips and the euphoria that came with the first snow of the year.

Potter watched her as a breathtaking smile graced her lips in her vulnerability as she abandoned her carefully calculated emotional wall. Her brilliant green eyes met his as she straightened and he thought she was going to yell but she just smiled at him.

"So perfect." Lily murmured, lost in the moment.

But like all moments, it passed and her eyes became guarded again. She turned and ran back into the building before he could respond.

With a careless smile, James stuffed his hands in his pockets and strolled away whistling to help Sirius and Remus with their latest prank.

Lily returned to the Three Broomsticks, her bracelet in hand.

"Oh, good. I was worried it would be lost. Are you okay? You look flushed?" He asked. Lily smiled at him, burying her guilt. She kissed another boy on her _first date ever. What the hell was wrong with her? _No. What the hell was wrong with James Potter. She resolved to yell at him next time she had him alone.

Then the guilt struck even harder when she realized who she'd kissed and why she hated him currently. She'd kissed the boy who was the reason one of her best friends was an emotional wreck. Oh, my god. None of this would ever have happened if she'd just told them that she'd kissed Potter last year after she and Snape had ended their friendship. She let out a heavy breath.

This is the problem with secrets. The longer you keep them secret, the more intricate they become and the more it becomes a habit until your entire life has become a lie and you have no one you can tell the truth to. She couldn't tell Vivian. It was her brother. She couldn't tell Taisie, she would cry and that was the last thing Lily needed, someone _else_ crying over her problems. She certainly couldn't tell Potter.

"It's snowing!" She said, patting the snow off of her coat. "It's so beautiful. I love the snow. It's feels like a new beginning. Nothing is ever the same after it snows; it's a whole new world." Aaron smiled at her words and pushed a steaming butter beer at her.

'You're completely right." Then he raised his glass to her. "To new beginnings."

Lily grasped her warm glass, her mouth forming around the toast, but her eyes. Her eyes were looking past Aaron to where the door was open and Potter and his friends had found their way into the overcrowded bar, laughing loudly and tousling each other's hair and faking punches.

"To new beginning," She said, her eyes connecting with James'. His head cocked in confusion before his lips slowly split into a hesitant but genuine smile. She smiled back before turning back to Aaron and saying again. "To new beginnings."

It was late when Lily finally returned to the Common Room, almost nine. She and Aaron had finally been forced to leave the Three Broomsticks when Madame Rosmerta threated to call Dumbledore down if they didn't return to the castle before dark.

"This was fun." Lily said as they walked slowly through the castle. "We should do it again sometime." Aaron grinned.

'We should." He agreed, slowing down in their walk in a deserted hallway. "My common room's that way." He murmured, leaning closer to her. "Yours is that way." Lily nodded.

"I guess, goodnight." She said weakly. Aaron lowered his head slowly.

_Oh, my god. He's going to kiss me. What if I can't kiss? What if my breath is bad? _Her thoughts ran wild with self doubt as she raised on her tippytoes to reach him. Her eyes closed as their lips met. His hands stayed with her hands, pressing his lips to hers gently. Not asking for anything more. They were warm and slightly chapped as she was sure hers were. She smiled in the kiss gently returning it.

She enjoyed it, yes. But she couldn't stop comparing it to Potter. She couldn't breathe or think when Potter kissed her. She burned everywhere when Potter kissed her, a burn that left her tingly and elated. When she kissed Potter, it was harsh and beautiful and demanding. It was passionate and dangerous. Aaron. Aaron was safe, Aaron was easy. It was easy to kiss him, he didn't ask her for more than she could give, he didn't push her to her limits and drive her nuts with emotional turmoil. It was different.

He pulled away and smiled at her. "Goodnight." He murmured as they both walked in different directions, their fingers leaving each others. Lily walked slowly up to the Gryffindor Tower, recalling all of her date. No one was in the common room when she returned, most had gone to bed or were still out with their dates doing who knows what. Lily grabbed her book from her secret spot behind the bricks of the fire and laid down on the couch, as the couples trickled in. She finished her book around midnight, it had been an hour since anyone had come into the common room. Everyone was in bed now.

She crouched in front of the fire and pulled from her shirt the letter her mother had written her. She let her face relax as she read it.

_Dear Lily,_

_We hoped for the best but recieved the worst. The company is being shut down, your father and I both lost our jobs. We've been trying to find new jobs but... the search does not go well. I can see your father turning to the bottle more every day. Petunia doesn't know and I don't want to tell her yet. I don't know how well she's handle it. _

_I'm telling you because I don't know if we'll be able to afford to send you to Hogwarts next year. I thought you should have some forewarning. _

_I'm so sorry, love. Things will pick up, though. Don't worry. _

_Love,_

_Mum._

Lily sat back against the chair closest to her and let a tear trickle out of her eye. Between her parents they barely made enough to survive each year, but without their jobs she didn't know what would happen to them. She knew her mum was lying when she said things would pick up. Lily had lived in their town her whole life and the people she knew who lost their jobs, did not get new ones no matter how hard they tried. They moved to an even worse part of town and depended on the government to survive. Her mother was an optimist only when she was looking in the face of pessimism. Now, Lily was struggling against her whole life as she tried to remain the optimist she'd always been.

Irrational anger filled her, directed at her parents. It wasn't their fault but she couldn't help but blame them. She was angry. She was so angry at her parents. Selfishly, she was angry that she might not be able to come back to school next year, that she would have a miserable summer inside an unhappy house, that she knew her father was going to try to drown his problems in alcohol and that when she got home it would be her job to sober him up. Her mother never dealt well with trauma or heavy events.

Her parents were great people. They always helped everyone else out, even when they couldn't afford to. But the worst things always happen to the best of people. And not everyone was strong enough to face every problem. She let the tears seep from beneath her eyelids, crying for her family, crying at her parent's weakness, crying at the injustice, and crying at their plain rotten luck.

She rubbed her eyes furiously and stood. With a shaky hand she reached out and tossed the letter into the fire.

"Life sucks." She muttered as she watched the edges of the paper curl and burn against the flames. In the wee hours of the morning, when the letter was ash at the bottom of a dying fire, she trudged up the stairs of the girls' tower. She fell onto her bed fully dressed, kicking her shoes off and hanging the jacket over her chair.

Lily lay back on her pillow, the breath rushing out of her as sleep overwhelmed her. Her last thought was not self-pity over her miserable situation, nor was it burning guilt that she had kissed Potter while on a date with Aaron, _nor_ was it immense anger at herself that she'd kissed the boy who'd just screwed over one of her best friends. Her last thought that she remembered was wishing that James Potter would stop kissing her. Because she didn't know how much longer she'd be able to hold out.

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><p><strong>His eye color has been changed back, you close minded people! Yeesh! Embrace change - don't run from it!<strong>

**I still love my readers and their opinions. Review more!**


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